Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

What am I supposed to do?

I am on vacation visiting my family, and I am staying with my mother. to give you some background my mother is notorious for borrowing money, never to pay it back, living a richer lifestyle then they can afford. She also attracts drama like crazy, she has been evicted from every rental she has ever had, apartments etc, my father just stays quiet and lets it happen. I for one was tired of it and moved out when I was 16. My mother has been telling me how everything is going great for them, this is the first time I have visited since my daughter was born. I have been nervous about it and apprehensive, turns out for good reason, today the landlord stopped by issueing an eviction notice for lack of payment, they either need to move out or pay 1500 dollars by the end of the week. *CNTD*

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 12:14 AM on Apr. 18, 2010 in Babies (0-12 months)

Answers (24)
  • we are not the best off, but we do have that money in the bank and my mother keeps asking me for the money, saying she will pay me back, i know there is no way she will ever do that, she never has, as it stands she owes each of her children over 500 dollars, I told her I would help in any other way, she restores furniture as a hobby and has enough in storage to pay the bill and even have extra money left over. I caught her today taking money out of my wallet to buy cigarrettes. I understand she needs help but she is not making any effort to help out, she has not had a job in over 5 years and there is no reason for it other then she just doesnt want to.
    My biggest problem is right now my daughter and i are supposed to stay with her until may 10th, when i fly back home, however they will need to find a home/ move in that time, what am I supposed to do? I do not want my newborn to be in a move!!

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:18 AM on Apr. 18, 2010

  • If you can actually spare the money, make a contract with her. An actual written contract stating what she borrowed, when the money needs to be paid back and in what amounts the payments will be. Hold her to it.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:20 AM on Apr. 18, 2010

  • How long are you there on vacation for/ By the way,,,doesnt sound like much of a vacation at this point. I think you should pack your bags and go home. Im sure you have been down this road with your family for years, they will figure out a way to get through it,,,,dont drag yourself and your baby into it. You need to go home,,,wherever home is,,,,and I pray it is more stable then this,,hugs

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:20 AM on Apr. 18, 2010

  • I would not help her...she will not help herself and I would not enable her. You wouldn't be helping, she will do it again. Let it go and leave.

    Answer by BradenIsMySon at 12:21 AM on Apr. 18, 2010

  • there is no way i would give her the money! that's for sure!

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:21 AM on Apr. 18, 2010

  • I agree with anon. Making a contract is the only way you can make sure you get your money back.

    Answer by JAIRATRACI at 12:22 AM on Apr. 18, 2010

  • OP here, the problem with the contract is my sister attempted that and my mother did not talk to her for 2 years saying that "its not appropriate for family members not to trust each other" she owes us all a lot of money. I can not fly back yet, there is no one at home. I came down to have help with my daughter while my husband is away, I am here until may tenth when he comes back home. Also no way I could fly right now, we are currently stationed in Germany and our connection is in spain, (all planes grounded because of ash)

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:27 AM on Apr. 18, 2010

  • Tell her you don't have any money. She should not know how much money you have.

    Answer by cristinaberger at 12:38 AM on Apr. 18, 2010

  • she knows we have more then enough we have been saving for 6 years now to buy a house, she is asking i take it out of the savings for a home for my family

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:41 AM on Apr. 18, 2010

  • If she says anything about not trusting a family member remind her of the money that she has borrowed before. If she won't sign one don't loan her any money.


    Answer by JAIRATRACI at 12:47 AM on Apr. 18, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.