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Have you ever kept a secret that changed your life?

I have. I lost my true love because I was bound by a terrible family secret. I wish I could just pick up the phone and tell this person what was wrong, and why I had to leave. Too many years have gone by for the secret to hurt anyone now. I just need to get this out and off of my mind so I can go on with my life. I don't know what impact this would have on the person I kept it from. I have written out the secret, prayed to G-d about the secret, but this person needs to know why, it is stuck in my head that this person should know. HELP!!!


Asked by Anonymous at 7:27 PM on Apr. 19, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • Will good come from telling it now? If so, tell it. If not, let it stay in the past.

    Answer by admckenzie at 7:47 PM on Apr. 19, 2010

  • whats the secret???

    Answer by BUSYLOVINGHIM at 7:28 PM on Apr. 19, 2010

  • So tell them.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:28 PM on Apr. 19, 2010

  • I think it would be important to see where they are in life too. If they need to know the answer, and if making contact now would make life difficult for them. If it wouldn't, then I think you need to tell them, you obviously feel it is significant and important. Try to also remember though that while something seemed like a very good reason to you, might make them say " why couldn't you trust me enough..." I have a secret that is mine alone, to expose it would be too hard for everyone.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:34 PM on Apr. 19, 2010

  • does the person need to know for their own sense of peace, or do you need to get it off your chest so you aren't at fault anymore in their eyes. They are two different things. If telling them would ease your mind but bring them more pain, you need to proceed very carefully. If you believe they genuinely NEED to know, and it would make them feel happier then by all means you should tell them

    Answer by myheartx4 at 7:37 PM on Apr. 19, 2010

  • The secret is this: I was a victim of incest and this man and I were to be married. I could not go through with the marriage because I felt 'dirty' and my attacker made it clear that marriage was not going to stop him from doing whatever he wanted with me, married or not. I ran away. As far away as I could get. Left no idea of why or where. This man I loved very much, he always wondered why I would not kiss him or even hold hands with him, even after 2 years of engagement. I did not want to bring him into a situation like that. What kind of life could we have had? I don't think it would change his life any, he married someone else, quite happy with his life. It is just that nagging thing on my mind that says, he should know that I dearly loved him, loved him enough not to let him get caught up in the crap of my life.


    Answer by Anonymous at 8:24 PM on Apr. 19, 2010

  • For similar reasons, I ran far far, 12years & I still havent faced him or my family At first I wanted him to know, but it would just be to wierd to say I Loved you but we have both moved on after so long.
    It was about 4years that It nagged at my heart.
    Good luck

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:28 PM on Apr. 19, 2010

  • i think you should tell him, it probably wont mean anything to him now but it will make you feel alot better and it cant hurt anyone now. Hopefully whoever you had incest with is locked up forever!! Be strong

    Answer by xxSummaxx13 at 7:04 PM on Apr. 22, 2010