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Have you been approach by strangers for not being able to calm your child down?

I would understand if you post your answers anon.


Asked by Anonymous at 4:27 PM on Apr. 20, 2010 in Toddlers (1-2)

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Answers (15)
  • My son has autism, and before he was diagnosed, an elderly lady came up to me and said " You need to give your son a swat on his bottom to get him to behave". I was shocked at first, but came back with " Ma'am, you need to mind your own business." Now that he's almost 12, he tells people who comment on his behavior "I have autism, what's YOUR excuse?"

    Answer by Robsmommy at 9:26 PM on Apr. 20, 2010

  • I think if someone approaches does that they obviously don't have kids of their own. Every child is different. My first was perfect in every way. My second acts like a maniac. I raised them exactly the same! I would be pretty pissed off if that happened to me.

    Answer by rlhall1980 at 4:29 PM on Apr. 20, 2010

  • Never not been able to calm my child or now my grandchild down. Approached all the time about how well behaved they are. I never use punishment like hitting, time-outs, taking things away, ect. or use threats, yell, swear, count, ect. that you hear in public. I use proactive parenting skills.


    Answer by Gailll at 4:31 PM on Apr. 20, 2010

  • No for calming down. I was only approached once by a lady who asked me why I gave my baby chewing gum. My "baby" was almost 4 but she was very small so she probably looked like a typical 18month old. I assured the old lady that she was indeed 4 and able to chew gum without choking. She just shook her head and walked away.

    Answer by BlooBird at 4:31 PM on Apr. 20, 2010

  • No, but my mom was holding my son in a store and he was acting out badly trying to head butt her (he's almost 2) and she tapped....LITERALLY TAPPED his leg not even enough to hurt and this lady gaver he the hugest stink eye for it. Like stared her down over it.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:31 PM on Apr. 20, 2010

  • Just don't mind them. They don't know what's really going on. And I would be pissed off as well.

    Answer by Energ8zr at 4:32 PM on Apr. 20, 2010

  • Typo. GAVE HER....Not gaver he...

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:33 PM on Apr. 20, 2010

  • yes. my youngest son has autism. his behavior now is that of a normally developing child, because i drastically changed my approach in teaching him. before he was diagnosed, i was at my whit's end taking him in public. he had a serious problem going from one room to the next, or from outside to inside, you get the idea. just walking through the door anywhere was enough to provoke a major melt down, and i was constantly getting rude comments and stares. after he was diagnosed, the developmental specialist we work with gave me business cards that read "my child is not bad. i am not a bad parent. my child has autism, and we are both learning to live with it. thank you for your concern." i handed one to a woman at the mall who told me to "shut that kid up or give him to someone who can!" she cried lol


    Answer by bestmommyeber at 4:41 PM on Apr. 20, 2010

  • In the hospital my daughter had a few meltdowns that we couldn't calm down right after she was born. A nurse came in and said "You can't let her cry like that." I wanted to slap her. Do you not see me nursing, cuddling, holding, rocking, changing, singing to, and TRYING MY DAMNDEST to get her to calm down? I was so pissed.

    Answer by Ati_13 at 5:00 PM on Apr. 20, 2010

  • Bestmommyeber- your story is a good reminder that we are too quick to judge and don't always know the whole story. Before I had kids I was one of those people who groaned when a family with kids sat next to me in a restuarant and now that I have my own child I realize that things aren't always black and white and I would never want to make a Mom feel worse when she is just trying to work with the hand she was dealt and trying to do her best. Like your card said, kids aren't always acting up because they are bad or because their parents are bad, sometimes there is more than meets the eye. I bet that woman will never repeat her mistake again, she learned a good lesson that day.

    Answer by MaryMW at 5:00 PM on Apr. 20, 2010

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