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What do you think will happen??

Okay I need to make a very long story short here. I had a baby in September 08, I was with her Bio dad for a little less than 3 months, we had a domestic violence incident (no actual violence occured but since our daughter was there we were both charged with domestic violence in the presence of a child). He has not seen our daughter since the day that happend which was January 1st of 2009. So here we are well over a year later, I'm married pregnant and I have moved on. He has been paying child support all along, but has never made a single attempt to visit our daughter. My daughter knows my current Husband as dad. I filed to terminate his parental rights so that my current husband can adopt her. Her Bio dad is now fighting it saying I have been denying him and his family visitiation. Cont..

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 4:37 PM on Apr. 20, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • He is saying they have repeatedly tried to visit and that I used the court system to make it so him and his family couldn't visit. That is not true, they have NEVER tried to visit her! They all know my number, where I live, and where my daughter is in day care and have never attempted. We go to court friday because he put in a request for immediate visitation AFTER I already filed to terminate his rights. So on Friday the judge will be hearing both cases. I am scared to death to confuse my 19 month old and have him get visits. Even if he has been paying me I dont' think its right he gets vistation, do you?? What do you think my chances are of getting him terminated after this length of time?? Any advice to help my case??
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:37 PM on Apr. 20, 2010

  • In my state, visitation and child support are totally different things. One has nothing to do with the other. I think that unless you can produce extensive evidence that he is a threat to her, that the judge will let him have visitation. I would make sure that you get the judge to understand that she doesn't know him as dad and only as a stranger to at least get supervised visitation. Also at that age, he may not get overnight stays due to her being so young but don't be surprised if it doesn't happen by the time she's 2.
    Jademom07

    Answer by Jademom07 at 4:43 PM on Apr. 20, 2010

  • Visitation and child support are completely separate issues. My oldest daughter is 27 now, but I divorced her father right before she turned two (he was abusive). He NEVER paid child support yet I had to give him visitation. I asked that because he didn't pay did I still have to let him see her, and the legal answer is yes. So in your situation, reverse it - just because he pays child support does not mean he will get visitation. Way back when, in California, if a parent did not see their child in a year then the other parent could file to terminate parental rights, and usually won. I don't know how it is now or how the laws are in your state, but I think you have a good chance of getting his rights terminated - not 100% but a good chance. Thing is, the courts these days think it's best that the child have contact with their biological parents, and that's not always best for the child. Good luck!
    TarLion

    Answer by TarLion at 6:47 PM on Apr. 20, 2010

  • And it also helps your case that he never filed for visitation until AFTER you filed to have his rights terminated. You've got a chance and I wish you the best.
    TarLion

    Answer by TarLion at 6:48 PM on Apr. 20, 2010

  • You cannot terminate his rights just bc you don't like the man or you don't want to confuse the child. He pays so he wants to be a part of the child's life. If not, he could walk away and never pay a dime again by allowing your dh to adopt the child. The court will side with him for visitation.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:16 PM on Apr. 20, 2010

  • He can't be granted visitation JUST because he pays child support. They will look at all angles of the case before they decide. Be sure you have all your ducks in a row and any papers, documents that back you up. Best wishes.
    rio_burb

    Answer by rio_burb at 11:29 PM on Apr. 20, 2010

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