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low sex drive

Do i have a problem? We have sex probably 2 or 3 times a month now...we had our first child 1 yr ago on friday. Anyone else have this problem? he feels his self esteem is getting low because he feels im not attracted to him anymore, because before we had the baby we had sex all the time. But when he asks and im not in the mood, im just not in the mood and i say no. I dont know what to do?

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Asked by Anonymous at 11:44 AM on Apr. 21, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (3)
  • Have your hormones checked. Maybe it's just a simple imbalance that can be fixed easily

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:48 AM on Apr. 21, 2010

  • Sux, don't it? Even without problems men need an enormous amount of ego boosting. I agree, see a Doctor and tend to any physical, chemical problems and let go of anything in the past that may be also affecting how you feel. By design, we are made to be extremely sensative and feeling in order to carry out the mission of motherhood, but that can work against us as well. Have you considered that his "overzealous " for you is his way of reaching out to you for help? He trusts you... grab each others hand and find that solution together, not as opponants. I know exactly how you feel and by the grace of God, I woke up to this fact. Prayers for both of you.


    Answer by GMMOLLY at 12:26 PM on Apr. 21, 2010

  • While you're checking those hormones, check your serum levels of B1, B3, B6, B12, magnesium, iron and zinc. Low sex drive has been linked to deficiencies in those particular vitamins and minerals. You could just start taking a good multivitamin and give it a few weeks to start working, or change up your diet to include lots of dark green leafy vegetables, sweet potatoes, strawberries, pumpkin seeds and legumes. Also, how much caffeine do you drink? Caffeine is a vasoconstrictor, meaning that it prevents capillaries from dilating, which affects sexual response. Are you getting 30 minutes a day of aerobic exercise? Doing so will boost your metabolism, which enhances absorption of crucial vitamins and minerals, plus it boosts your mood.

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:20 AM on Apr. 22, 2010

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