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Already in love and haven't met the child yet....

My husband and I are adopting through the foster care system.. A handsome 9 year old little boy who has been through hell and back. We haven't met him yet. We have his history and back ground.. We're going to meet him this weekend and I am scared. We start our pre placement visits this weekend!! I'm excited and nervous at the same time. We've already done his room and bought him clothes and a PS3 .. Just everything. Has anyone ever been through this? Meeting your child for the first time. I'm scared I'll see him and start crying. lol. How did you calm yourself before the first meeting?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 4:05 PM on Apr. 21, 2010 in Adoption

Answers (9)
  • I have no words of wisdom, but congrats and I admire you for adopting an older child
    peanutsmommy1

    Answer by peanutsmommy1 at 4:06 PM on Apr. 21, 2010

  • All i can say is AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW! I was the 5 year old that was picked out and went thru this, so this melts my heart! Good luck!!! Remember one step at a time!
    TheDiva320

    Answer by TheDiva320 at 4:06 PM on Apr. 21, 2010

  • Once you meet him it will be hard to return him! We got lucky, when DD came to visit us for just a weekend they asked us to take her because they needed her bed at the foster home she was in. What an exciting time. Enjoy!
    BlooBird

    Answer by BlooBird at 4:28 PM on Apr. 21, 2010

  • congratulations! so sweet that you are already in love. be prepared, there will be challenges ahead! older child adoption is not a walk in the park, but the rewards are all that much sweeter when you persevere and see healing come.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:12 AM on Apr. 22, 2010

  • I am so happy for you! I'm sure that inside you will be overwhelmed with joy when you meet him but you must not lose your cool or be overly dramatic when you meet your child. Remember that there are many steps along this path and that it will be much easier for him if things are calm and easy. And DON'T SPOIL HIM!!!! (even if you want to)
    Suzy_Sunshine

    Answer by Suzy_Sunshine at 11:15 AM on Apr. 22, 2010

  • no words of wisdom but I wish you all the luck and success in the world.
    onethentwins

    Answer by onethentwins at 12:38 PM on Apr. 22, 2010

  • Good Luck:)
    Luuckymommy

    Answer by Luuckymommy at 3:50 PM on Apr. 22, 2010

  • Start out as you mean to go. Don't do lots of special activities when you first meet him. Keep it simple. Try not to have tons of people over to meet him. It can overwelm them. If possible and you haven't already done it get a photo album that he can take with him when he goes back to the foster home between visits. Include pictures of his room, school, church, family members, pets, etc. Include their names and how they would be related. After a visit or 2 see if the foster parents will let him start to leave a few of his clothes, toys in his new bedroom so it makes it his room and is more familer.

    Expect the worse but pray for the best. Expect a honeymoon period and then all H to break loose before getting better.
    baconbits

    Answer by baconbits at 12:28 PM on Apr. 23, 2010

  • right now your in love with the idea. and can't believe this is for real. and that it is going to happen real soon. but when you do have have Im. sure you'll know what to do, just don't be nervious,, and relax. and you'll see every thing will be okay. and by the way congrats.;0
    incarnita

    Answer by incarnita at 7:01 PM on Apr. 24, 2010

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