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To tell or not to tell, what would you do?

Here is the situation - My bil is 21. He lives at home and is jobless. He does not have a job because he can't find one, he is looking. He could get a part time job but then he wouldn't have benefits. He needs insurance because he has epilepsy and his medication is $1000/month. He is currently on the county assistance for insurance. So if he just get s part time job he would lose that but will not be able to afford his medication and his other bills. So my inlaws are currently paying everything for him. Anyway, he opened his trunk of his car for dh the other day and a case of budlight was in there. He said their other brother was coming over later and they hang out on the patio and drink. Drinking can totally interfere with his meds and basically cause him to have a seizure. I was debating on telling my inlaws, just because he lives at home, they are helping him out and the drinking is taking place at their house.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:57 PM on Apr. 21, 2010 in Just for Fun

Answers (8)
  • myob!
    r00j04j08

    Answer by r00j04j08 at 6:58 PM on Apr. 21, 2010

  • He is a grown up and you're going to tell his mommy and daddy? Just remember, most people don't appreciate a tattle tale....his parents may even get annoyed at you for this. Just mind your own business..................more people really need to.
    BridgetC140

    Answer by BridgetC140 at 7:01 PM on Apr. 21, 2010

  • Okay, mind my own business. So you are saying if your son was doing this that you wouldn't want to know? That is what I am torn with, because I would want to know. It isn't like it is strangers, or a neighbor and I am being really nosy. It is family and we are all really close.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:01 PM on Apr. 21, 2010

  • I would tell given the situation. I love my BILs all very much and would be devastated if something happened that I could have helped prevent. I've been in the situation before where I had to tell MIL about something for the benefit of the family member involved. It did cause some issues between us, but I'd rather have someone mad at me than something bad happen to people I love.
    Ginger0104

    Answer by Ginger0104 at 7:07 PM on Apr. 21, 2010

  • Well, it is happening at their house right? Do you really think they are completely in the dark? He's not a child anyway. What difference does it make that he is on PA? Why did you have to add that? So since he is on PA, he shouldn't have beer or anything extra?

    It doesn't matter if they would want to know or not....it's not your business to tell. You sound like a real busy body.
    BridgetC140

    Answer by BridgetC140 at 7:07 PM on Apr. 21, 2010

  • I can understand your concern but this time, I'd just not say anything. He probably just wants to have a few. Is it chronic drinking? Do you know? You can always ask the inlaws if they "think" he's drinking. That might plant the seed and then you wouldn't betray him or them, this time.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:07 PM on Apr. 21, 2010

  • I guess I added the PA part to show the seriousness of his situation. If he didn't have medical issues then he could have at least a part time job, pay for his bills and not depend on his parents. So I guess I also see the drinking as him throwing their help in their face. I mean if he is not working because of insurance, but drinking to mess up his meds, what is the point anyway? I guess at least it will be covered when he has to go to the hospital for a seizure (that he could prevent)

    Thank-you Ginger. That is why I am having a hard time not telling. He is my bil but he is also like a brother. I have been in his life since he was 5.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:16 PM on Apr. 21, 2010

  • I would drop a dime in the sneak tip.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:25 PM on Apr. 21, 2010

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