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Just need to rant (Just because im a sahm doesnt mean i dont work)

Ewwwww i love my husband but i hate how he picks out things that are dirty, im pregnant and i have a two yr old son i think i keep the house pretty decent but i cant keep it spotless if he sees something dirty like he did tonight he tells me theres no sense in it and that i sit at home on my butt all day and it should be clean...
the house is always decent i take care of our son iim very tired with this pregnancy i always have supper ready when he walks threw the door and he still acts like i dont do anything! it makes me so mad b/c i work from the time i get up until i go to bed

when he gets home from work he eats and then sits in front of the tv until he goes to bed and i clean up his mess im so tired of hearing i dont do ANYTHING

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:25 PM on Apr. 21, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (17)
  • I'm hearing ya honey. Got one of those at my house too! Love them to pieces even if they are behaving like spoilt wankers! LOL
    myheartx4

    Answer by myheartx4 at 10:26 PM on Apr. 21, 2010

  • oooh, if he pointed something out to me i would really piss him off. I would say.."then why don't you do something about it"
    I mean, someone has the time to sit and bitch about something not being cleaned...surely they can get off their ass and clean it. Takes just as much energy if you ask me.
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 10:27 PM on Apr. 21, 2010

  • i thinks since he makes the money and i stay at home i have all the free time in the world it makes me so mad he has never changed a diaper gave our son a bath or even once filled our sons sippy cup up with juice or something then he wonders why our son never wants to do anything with him..... i dont know what im going to do with a 2nd child i have no clue how i will keep a spotless home i wish he would spend one day in my shoes!!!!!!!!!!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:31 PM on Apr. 21, 2010

  • I'm a working mom, always have been always will be- you sahms do more work than I can even imagine!! Don't ever let someone tell you that you don't work!! Too bad he can't stay home for a few days while you go to work and he can see what its like
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:32 PM on Apr. 21, 2010

  • I deal with this too but mine is slightly smarter. he doesnt say anything directly but during fights thats the first thing"sit around all day" so what I did was, I stopped doing HIS stuff. no lunches, no laundry, no dishes that were his. when he asked I said"hey um thats not mine, the rest and the kids, thats my job, but your stuff is yours" and I also made the weekend sleep in rule. I sleep in one day out of the weekend, because I work and I deserve a day off too. sometimes I dont get a whole day but since i stopped the cleaning up after him for a few days, he is much more sensitive let me tell ya.so on the weekend, when he is off, tell him"ok when is my day off?" or better yet, grab your keys and say bye bye, and go for the day, do what ya want. if he gets mad say"oh sorry didnt realize I was a servant who couldnt leave." lol good luck.
    Bearsjen

    Answer by Bearsjen at 10:34 PM on Apr. 21, 2010

  • I was married to one of those before.... Hence the word WAS.. He was an A$$, would get pissed if I was tired and wanted to go to bed after the kids were all in bed. Wanted to keep me pregnant so I would be at home, but yet would tell me what a useless POS I was because I didn't "work". Babysat every brat in the neighborhood so I could feed his lazy A$$.. So enough was enough, I threw him out the door and never looked back. I refused to stay with someone that was going to teach our boys that treating someone you love like shit was okay... Sorry got a little carried away, your post brought up a lot of bad memories..
    MrsLeftlane

    Answer by MrsLeftlane at 10:35 PM on Apr. 21, 2010

  • "i wish he would spend one day in my shoes!!!!!!!!!!!"

    You should see if you can arrange this. I mean, he obviously can't be pregnant too, but you can leave him to take care of your house and 2-year-old for 24 hours.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:35 PM on Apr. 21, 2010

  • thanks its hard being a sahm not ever having money for myself and never getting out to do anything and getting bi**h at when im so tired and just wanna relax!! i really do try to make him happy and make sure everything is cleaned and everything is nice for all of us! it just upsets me to hear him say that when i work harder than he does and i know that for a fact because he does nothing hard at work but maybe standing in a circle of guys talking all day! i have been to his work many of times
    i just wish i could get a little Respect!!
    I thank him all the time for working everyday and apperciate everything he does for us but he could help me out and spend time with our son and let the small things go its a every nigh thing with him it drives me crazy
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:38 PM on Apr. 21, 2010

  • have you been honest with him like you are being now? The idea that he is the one who earns the money is so arrogant - he couldn't go off to work without a care if you weren't at home with the baby! Have you said " you value a spotless home over my happiness" - " you put more value on a clean kitchen than on whether I am exhausted" - " I am not your employee, but if this continues I will issue you with an invoice for 24 hr childcare and daily home cleaning" Find out child care rates, and cleaning rates - find out your own worth and next time he throws it at you tell him what he would pay to have an outsider do what you do
    myheartx4

    Answer by myheartx4 at 10:45 PM on Apr. 21, 2010

  • lol your hubby wouldn't last a day in my house! i'm a SAHM too. i have 3 kids ages 2,4,and 5. i keep a very clean house, but i don't (i flat out refuse to) do it on my own! the way i see it, we all live here, so we all need to take part in cleaning up. of coarse i do most of it, but no way would i pick up after another adult! why do men think that we SAHMs have all day to focus on cleaning? i can't speak for everyone, but i know i have way more than just cleaning to do! my hubby had that attitude 4 yrs ago when i was pregnant with baby #2, so the 1st time he got a 3 day weekend, i took off for work 9 hours each day! (mom owns a restaurant so she helped me prove the point) sense then he doesn't even suggest that he works more than me. he knows better! he got a taste of just 1 toddler and 3 days of SAHM life, and now he doesn't want to know what it's like with 3!

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:45 PM on Apr. 21, 2010

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