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Should teachers be involved in disciplining children for behavior in school?

I'm at my wits end. My son just turned 7 and has issues such as always wanting to be called on, always wanting to be first, getting upset with other children if they answer incorrectly, etc. He's academically advanced (already being tested for gifted n talented), highly focused, loves to learn, etc. About every 2 weeks he gets a note home about an incident about angry outbursts in class. I have done the following on my part-counseling, extracurricular activities outside of school to show team work, punishment, daily chats about appropriate behavior in school, etc. We do not have these issues with him at home or in swimming, karate, etc.

At what point should the school start disciplining him? For example taking away recess, etc. Or is it soley up to me. His teacher is great, I've sat in on class and she has a wonderful style.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 8:06 AM on Apr. 22, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (7)
  • Sometimes it is neccesary for more than the parents to show conciequence (cant spell today sorry:). However from what I read it seems that your son has anger control issues. Maybe you should just work on that and ry to get him to understand that not everyone knows the right answer but you still have to give them a chance. Maybe he should be bumped up a grade so he can learn instead of getting angry at those who need to as well.

    Answer by SabrenaLeigh at 8:13 AM on Apr. 22, 2010

  • I am sure the teacher is working on it in class as well but wants to inform you of the situation so you can work as a team. A teachers job is to get everyone involved to make sure the child is learning all they can. It is a team effort and she just wants you included, she is probably not trying to put it all on you!
    Good lcuk- sometimes gifted children have a hard time coping with typical chidlren. I have a few gifted chidlren in my family and they have different social issues. Try to keep on him about socializing and have play dates etc. It sounds like he already is having a hard time with his social skills. Sorry to go on and on I am a early childhood major!


    Answer by MoriahL at 8:50 AM on Apr. 22, 2010

  • I am surprised they havent started taking away recesses. Here that is one of the things they do. Like they give a warning, then 5 minutes of recess, 10 minutes, 15 minutes, all recess. If there is an extreme incident they won't increment. they also have behavior cards that go everywhere with them for whomever they get in trouble with can write it on their card. the cards are sent home everyweek. Also, they can have them sit alone at lunch if there are problems there.

    These are the techniques I have seen in the younger grades - K - 2nd.....The upper grades have less issues, but still miss recess with different problems, but also have other things. They have these sheets they can fill out and everything. I have never seen one of the sheets done yet - which is a good thing.

    Have you involved the SCHOOL counselor? What does his outside counselor think the problem is?

    Answer by aly38914290 at 8:58 AM on Apr. 22, 2010

  • OP here---Yes, the school counselor is involved....for the anger management issues. His teacher sends me a daily behavior card (at MY request) along with a note if he didn't have a good day. As a mom I am willing to go above and beyond and I'm very active with the support team at the son is making great progress which is why I feel he should be punished in school.When it comes to these classroom issues I think the discipline should be joint. I know for a fact that aside from talking to him there r no reprecussions of his behavior in school.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:19 AM on Apr. 22, 2010

  • i am a teacher and i think it is the school's job to punish for in school misbehavior. parents job to talk to the kid and be informed about the issue. but in my classroom (1st-3rd grade -- title one -- so it is an intervention classroom --- not special ed -- just kids who are a little behind) the behavior management is followed : positive days work is rewarded with a sticker chart. when a child breaks a rule: first time -verbal warning, second time - writing assignment (write the rule twice and then draw yourself following it,) third time - phone call home to discuss a plan to better the child's success, fourth time - lunch detention (just sit by themselves quietly) and fifth time - afterschool detention.. if a child continues the same behavior after my 5 attempts i then turn it over to the office for suspensions. i have also seen in other classrooms monthy or weekly goal charts for problematic behaviors...

    Answer by AmaliaD at 12:14 PM on Apr. 22, 2010

  • the weekly charts set short term goals for the kid to IMPROVE the behavior... they get rewarded or punished based on their success in reaching that goal.. when a child has mastered controlling the behavior in the weekly charts. then they move to larger monthly goals with larger rewards. teacher provide the rewards (no we arent reinbursed but it is better than being negative and punishing the kid for the same stuff over and over) and a reward can be free too - simple as 20 min of free time in the gym with a friend of choice.. if you need more info please cm me.

    Answer by AmaliaD at 12:23 PM on Apr. 22, 2010

  • You need to be rewarding him for good behavior. If his behavior note comes home good put a star on the calendar. When he has 5 stars give him something he likes. (Do pokemon cards still work for that age?)

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:42 PM on Apr. 22, 2010

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