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My husband promised my mom he would work in her catering business this summer. He said he would to help and stay close to home so that I could work at the school as the counselor. It is easier to manage the kids when we are all close. Well, he came to me today and..

said he didn't know if he was going to do the job or take a dif. job an hour away. AFTER he already said to me and my mom that he was taking the job with her. i am mad because he is being selfish. He doesn't come to me and talk to me about maybe wanting to do this other job and makes these promises and we arrange things around that promise. He said he has been thinking for a while about which one to take. I think that sucks. What would you do or say??

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:57 AM on Apr. 22, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • It sounds to me like he's trying to talk to you about it now. He didn't say he WAS taking it, just that he didn't know.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 9:00 AM on Apr. 22, 2010

  • he has a secret life?

    I would be off the wall wondering wtf is his problem. but then again. i'm certified mad.
    rucafox

    Answer by rucafox at 9:01 AM on Apr. 22, 2010

  • could he just be trying to help make more money?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:02 AM on Apr. 22, 2010

  • if it would be my husband doing this to me, i'd make him go to my mom and explain himself. i would. see if anything comes out of that conversation first and if your husband drops out then be sure that you have someone else in mind that you could do it with
    americansugar80

    Answer by americansugar80 at 9:02 AM on Apr. 22, 2010

  • if that job would bring in more money then i would tell him to go for it...if he is just trying to get out of working with your mom, then i would be bitchin
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 9:08 AM on Apr. 22, 2010

  • I would say something like "well why did you not tell me about this sooner? You already promised mom you would work for her, and things have already started being arranged around this promise. " I would ask about the other options, and then give my input. If he chose not to work with mom then HE should be the one to talk to her about it and explain. I would also tell him that if he chooses to take the job 1hr away then HE is going to have to figure out a solution to childcare and HE will have to pay for childcare as you have the counseling job at school going on- and you should not be expected to change your plans just because he will not follow thru on his promise.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:38 AM on Apr. 22, 2010

  • OP: He DID say he was taking the job. What about my feelings and needs. I made a committment to the school to be the conselor bc he was going to be close to home to help with the kids. If he works an hour away I can't do the job. That is why my mom got him the job. He actually asked her to help him out. So she did and now he is thinking of another job that pays LESS money. I don't get why it is always the woman who has to sacrifice for the man. He gets to break a promise and bail out and I am supposed to support that. If I did that to him I bet I would be scolded by him and moms on here. That stinks!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:41 PM on Apr. 22, 2010

  • OP: THANK YOU ANON.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:43 PM on Apr. 22, 2010

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