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i just found i had a younger brother

and the way i found out is he added me to facebook, we have the same 29 and he is so hurt by this... i knew my dad had 3 older kids from his military days...i cant believe he cheated on my mom....any advice at all will be great


Asked by Anonymous at 10:17 PM on Apr. 23, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • Just try to keep an open mind. A few years ago my husband found out he has a younger sister, from an affair his dad had when he was 7. She wants a relationship with all of us, but MIL plays blind & FIL wants nothing to do with her, we're guessing out of respect for his marriage and deceased daughter (who would've been the same age) but no one will talk about it so we'll never really know.
    I just try to offer my husband support and encourage him to just get to know her. It's just hard for him having zero support from his family and a little awkward at the same time. He has opened up quite a bit and they talk occasionally, e-mail, she has even visited a few times. It will never be a sibling relationship, but it has meant so much to her just to be acknowledged by us. It's really complicated, but you can never have to many people in your life who love/support you. I wish you both the best.

    Answer by Ashes0813 at 1:13 AM on Apr. 24, 2010

  • Advice: Keep an open mind - it's not your brother's fault. If anything, be upset at dad. Try just e-mailing brother and get to know a little at a time .. Don't expect a wonderful close relationship right away ... move slow. Good Luck.

    Answer by NOLAmommaKRYS at 10:20 PM on Apr. 23, 2010

  • Yes be upset with your father, not your brother. I found my biological brother online and when I told him who I was he got angry and accused me of lying and blocked me. Whatever. His loss.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:06 PM on Apr. 23, 2010

  • I discovered I have an older sister not too long ago. My dad told me in the aisle of a dollar store of all places. I never really had much respect for the guy (other issue), but I'm glad he at least got it off his chest. I'm the last person in the world to ever judge another's actions. Not sure why he kept it a secret for so long. I feel like I missed out on a lot - would have been nice to have an older sister in my corner when I was a young girl. Oh, well. Can't change the past, can only build the future..............

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:49 PM on Apr. 23, 2010

  • It can be hard to deal with at first. I have found out over the years that I have 5 brothers and 1 sister. The situation is diffrent than yours since my mother and father were only married a short time but it was a shock none the less. Take it as it comes and keep an open heart and mind at least where your brother is concerned. I cannot say how you should feel towarsd your father as you are the one going through it but life is too short to hold on to anger for very long. When you are able, embrace having another member of your family. Many people have no family at all. Good luck!

    Answer by MrsHatch4 at 1:03 AM on Apr. 24, 2010

  • We can all use more people to love

    Answer by rkoloms at 7:34 AM on Apr. 24, 2010