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this is a tough one.....

Just to start off, Im totally in love with my fiance and love being a family (we have 1 little boy who is 1 1/2).
That being said, my ex moved back down from college about a year ago. He lives about 2 minutes from me. We've chatted a few times....blah blah blah. We dated for about 6-9 months almost 7 YEARS GO!!!! doesnt seem like a big deal right? But we went through a lot and had that kind of "The Notebook" love......anyways, We talked about why we still had this 'connection' and he said its because we never had closure. And he kinda said it like he had already had many convo's about it with other people...we dont talk anymore but I still think about him every now and then.
So my question (s)
do u think its just because he was my first LOVE?
How do I get closure?
....is this just "the grass is greener syndrome?"
and dont be nasty....thanks, I really appreciate any advice!

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:15 PM on Apr. 23, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (4)
  • Not a dumb question at all. I have been divorced from my ex for 7 yrs. He moved back into town last year. He is very involved in our lives now, way more then before. He recently started coming to my church,,,,dd invited him. So here we are,,,sitting next to each other at church for the past few Sundays..lol..Its hard,,,ya know..I thought this was going to last forever,,,and it didnt. So I think we are left with the dream of what we had hoped could have been, the fairytale forever. As I sat next to him in church last week,,,and really who sits next to their ex in church? I realized that there was closure, that happened a long time ago. There was closure when I went to the lawyer to file for divorce, my heart broke that day. There was closure when we stood on the steps of the court house and he begged me to reconsider,,I couldnt go back to that life...and I cant sit next to him in this church anymore,,,closure,,,,a long time ago
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:33 PM on Apr. 23, 2010

  • I had this same confusion... I had been with my DH (we werent married at that point though) for a while, had one kid together but we were having problems. xh decides to start coming around and acting sweet (we had a child together too)... I was torn! Go with the one I'm with, even though we're having problems, or give my xh another chance?? I mean, I could use the excuse "be with the father of my child" but I had one with each of them. Fate (or God, or whatever) gave me my answer when DH and I got pregnant. When I told xh that I just couldn't do the "emotional affair" thing and that we were over (and that I was prego) he bailed and hasnt even called since. I mean, he was father of the year until he knew there was no chance of us getting back together and then *poof* he disappeared. Hope my story helped.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:15 PM on Apr. 24, 2010

  • Involving an ex is trouble honey, leave it alone.
    ambr2006

    Answer by ambr2006 at 3:08 PM on Apr. 24, 2010

  • thanks ladies! i appreciate it!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:16 PM on Apr. 26, 2010

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