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Question about co-sleeping and maintaining a healthy relationship with the husband

I would like to hear from other moms that co-sleep. How do you manage to have a sex life with a child who sleeps in you room? I have a 2 and a half and a 10 months old. So far we have been real quiet (which I can barely manage). I am worried that my oldest will wake up one night and see us. My husband has memories from when he was 2. So my toddler might remember something later on. I don't know what is the right thing to do in my situation. I should mention that we have two queen beds side by side and the baby sleeps on one bed, me and my husband are on the other bed and the toddler is in his toddler bed. So technically they are NOT in our bed when we have intercourse.

Answer Question
 
cristinaberger

Asked by cristinaberger at 1:31 AM on Apr. 24, 2010 in Relationships

Level 3 (20 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • Go in another room
    EternalDreams

    Answer by EternalDreams at 1:33 AM on Apr. 24, 2010

  • living room floor works well. Also get an air matress u can set up in the living rm or spare rm for when u want to be close.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:33 AM on Apr. 24, 2010

  • I can't leave the baby unsupervised. She could crawl off the bed or the toddler could get to her. I tried placing her in a crib but she wakes up within 5 minutes.
    cristinaberger

    Answer by cristinaberger at 1:35 AM on Apr. 24, 2010

  • we go on the floor, you could go in the hall right out side the door so you are far enough away to stop if they wake up but close enough to hear if she wakes up.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:42 AM on Apr. 24, 2010

  • wake up early beforethekids? we loveearly runs
    mirit.rose

    Answer by mirit.rose at 1:45 AM on Apr. 24, 2010

  • LOL! This isn't going to happen Hon. Most husbands will either wind up leaving you or sleeping in another room. Why would any man want a baby in his bed? He doesn't. You need to put that child in another room after 1 month old. He needs to get used to his own bed, and away from you. That is ridiculous. Do it now, before you can't ever get that kid out of your room. Where is your sense of privacy? Seriously...
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:45 AM on Apr. 24, 2010

  • "you could go in the hall right out side the door"

    That's where my air inlet is for the AC. It would suck my hair in through the vent. LOL. I don't know about the floor idea. It doesn't sound too romantic to me. I don't want to have sex just to satisfy some kind of biological function. I miss the old days when we had nothing else to do.
    cristinaberger

    Answer by cristinaberger at 1:45 AM on Apr. 24, 2010

  • "Most husbands will either wind up leaving you or sleeping in another room. Why would any man want a baby in his bed? He doesn't."

    Actually, he wants them there more than I do. We are from a different country. It's a cultural thing, we all sleep together with our babies. He told me that he sleeps better at night hearing their breath. I do too.
    cristinaberger

    Answer by cristinaberger at 1:47 AM on Apr. 24, 2010

  • Wow, seriously anon, what if she didn't have another room? How insulting. She asked for advice, not a lecture on what she's doing wrong. And not all men are such pigs.

    If your bathroom connects to your bedroom try taking a shower together for some 'quality time' and just leave the door open so you can still hear or keep an eye out for the baby. Or maybe a friend or family member can take them for a night?

    And honestly I know a lot of people who have walked in on their parents before and while traumatizing at first, we get over it :) Not that I'm saying 'who cares' but accidents happen.

    Good luck though :)
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:12 AM on Apr. 24, 2010

  • Wow, seriously anon, what if she didn't have another room? How insulting. She asked for advice, not a lecture on what she's doing wrong. And not all men are such pigs.

    If your bathroom connects to your bedroom try taking a shower together for some 'quality time' and just leave the door open so you can still hear or keep an eye out for the baby. Or maybe a friend or family member can take them for a night?

    And honestly I know a lot of people who have walked in on their parents before and while traumatizing at first, we get over it :) Not that I'm saying 'who cares' but accidents happen.

    Good luck though :)
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:12 AM on Apr. 24, 2010

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