Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

should i just give up on him? no bashing please

i been 'seeing' (not sure what else to call it) this guy(a)for a few months we get along great and we have a lot in common but he keeps sending mixed signals...he says he misses me, gives kisses and hugs when we see each other, he tells me one day he wants a gf ect then next day he says he doesnt want to be tied down...i know he doesnt want long term, at least it seems that way. i bring up relationship stuff causally he says generalized stuff but when it gets 'too deep' he changes the subject.also say he doesnt want kids, i have 3. one of my guy friends(b), we been friends for almost a year now, says today he wants more than friends and wants long term and wants kids and is happy with being a step parent, i really like this guy and could see him and i gettin serious. so should go ahead and go with him(b) and just forget about (a)? (a) just doesnt seem to be too interested in me, and i love my friend(b) to death..

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:49 PM on Apr. 24, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • the first guy is just stringing you along. he's not that into you. go with the guy who treats you right. then the first one might come running but tell him no. guys who are good to you and your kids are treasures and hard to find.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:59 PM on Apr. 24, 2010

  • Move on. He doesn't know what he wants.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:53 PM on Apr. 24, 2010

  • Move on. He doesn't know what he wants.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:55 PM on Apr. 24, 2010

  • Yes I say move on. As they say in the movie...sorry girl, he's just not that into you.....Not trying to be mean but you deserve someone who knows they want to be with you, not someone who is wishy-washy all of the time.

    As far as the "friend", second guy is concerned. Maybe it would be best to just spend some time alone and not rush into things?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:55 PM on Apr. 24, 2010

  • although he may not know what he wants now, i see no reason not to continue dating if he is exclusive. Its only been a few months , some people date for years before getting married. Just keep an open mind and see where it goes. I would stay, but make it clear that you want a relationship and that you at least want to be exclusive, then it is up to him if he wants to stay in the relationship. don't give up until you make it clear what you want. at least then you wont have to wonder.
    TaiM

    Answer by TaiM at 7:00 PM on Apr. 24, 2010

  • op here

    i have told him i want serious exclusive then he replies with i cant be tied down...i even told him that i was into him and he says just wait you will hate me sooner or later...then flirts with me..its like emotional roller coaster with him..maybe im not being straight forward enough with him... im thinking anon 55 P is right maybe he isnt that into me, cause he also talks about trying to hook up with the neighbor chick, and at times i cant tell if he is joking or serious... and this other guy is straight forward and to the point he knows what he wants, and he used to date my friend b4 she killed herself so i know how loyal he is and how well he treats a woman( she died a year ago)
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:10 PM on Apr. 24, 2010

  • if he doesn't have kids and doesn't want kids and you have THREEE then yes move on I mean thats common sense.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:13 PM on Apr. 24, 2010

  • op here

    if he doesn't have kids and doesn't want kids and you have THREEE then yes move on I mean thats common sense.

    i know it should be, even with that its one thing one day and another the next...it seriously like im dealing with 2 different people...he said he doesnt want his own kids, but yet wants to set up trips to take me and my kids places to show this and that(which i havent gone to do yet i dont want them gettin attached then have him walk completely out of my life)
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:19 PM on Apr. 24, 2010

  • i was confused , you were talking about 2 different guys?? if so then go with the guy who wants a relationship. i thought it was one guy who changed his mind... go with the man who shows he wants you.. and if the other one jokes about hooking up with someone else he sounds immature.. i pick guy number two.. and let us know how it goes.

    P.s. i was in love with this guy and he never wanted to be committed to me. i started dating my now husband and then the ex boyfriend started to talk about marriage. but it was too late and i wanted to see where it would go with this new guy and i am glad i did, 6 years and two children later and realizing that my ex was not the right one for me.
    TaiM

    Answer by TaiM at 7:22 PM on Apr. 24, 2010

  • I'd let a go and check and see where b goes but you don't have to settle for either one. There are more men out in the world.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 8:37 PM on Apr. 24, 2010