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How can I stop crushing on a guy that I can't have? I have never felt this way before...

There is this guy that I have known since we were little kids, he has always flirted with me but when the opportunity came up, I rejected him. I felt that he was too young for me at the time and thought that all he wanted was sex. I ended up in verbally abusive relationship that lasted almost 3 years. He also got into a relationship and they had a baby together. He and I talked the other night and he said he was unhappy in his relationship, that he tries but he's giving up hope and knows that it won't last. I told him I regretted passing him up and others as well. He told me he would help me pick out a good guy but would still be kinda jealous. We laughed and talked for a couple hours. I seen him again last night and we talked for a few minutes. I have never liked anyone who has a girlfriend or wife, no matter what because it's wrong but I can't stop thinking about him. I know we can't be together so I need to stop crushing.

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Asked by Anonymous at 7:33 PM on Apr. 25, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (5)
  • I'm confused.... it doesn't really sound like you want to stop crushing on him. Why not just hang back and see what happens? Don't break him and his girlfriend up. Just hang in there, give him space, and wait until he takes the steps.

    Answer by Adelicious at 7:43 PM on Apr. 25, 2010

  • Did you ever wonder what it is that makes you see him differently now? He is the same guy he was when you passed him up. Only now he's tied to someone else. That is probably the only thing that has changed. Don't be lead by your subconscious desires. You could be the next one he dumps for someone else.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:44 PM on Apr. 25, 2010

  • I'm glad you think it's wrong. Sorry, can't help you with the thinking. That's hard. : (

    I guess the one thing I would say is that sometimes we make someone better than they are in our mind, you know?

    Answer by Sara.Robyson at 7:51 PM on Apr. 25, 2010

  • If he's not married and he's not happy then I don't see what the problem is. He is a single man who wants to see where things can go with you...I'd go for it.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:03 PM on Apr. 25, 2010

  • Move on. You can't have what isn't yours. If he has someone in his life, you opportunity has passed.

    Answer by Lifes-A-Dance at 9:14 PM on Apr. 25, 2010

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