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Need new ideas to help 3 1/2 yr old with screaming fits?

My son is throwing screaming fits when he doesn't get his way. I have tried walking away from him and putting him in a room with the door closed but he contunies to scream and kick the door. He has now started hitting me and my husband and we both feel like we are losing our minds. I have done the spanking thing but it is not working. Any advice you have would help................

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:42 PM on Apr. 25, 2010 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Answers (5)
  • I would scream too if I wouldn't get my way. Recommend Screamfree parenting book.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:44 PM on Apr. 25, 2010

  • Keep ignoring the screaming. Tell him that when he can act like a big boy you will talk to him about what he wants or needs. He could be overstimulated and need less activity and more time to calm down. Spanking is not going to work, take a kid that is already out of control and hitting and spank him. Hmm...to me that is telling him it is ok to continue hitting people. You could ask his pediatrician what they suggest or if there could be some underlying issue going on.
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 7:54 AM on Apr. 26, 2010

  • We went through this at 3 years old with my Son. DONT SPANK. If you need a breather just walk away for a few minutes. This is what we did, at home we would ignore for a few seconds and if it became worse, we would bend down to his level and give him a big hug and kiss and just hold him and maybe a little tickle after a few minutes to make him laugh. If we are out in public, we remove him immediately by picking him up and holding his hands so he can't hit. Put him in the car as fast as possible locked in the seat and ignore and after a few minutes of driving talk quietly to him. Make him apologize when he calms down every time. My son is now 3 1/2 and the tantrums and bad behavior have greatly diminished. Be consistent & calm. Don't overreact because that is what they want. If you don't react negatively and he still doesn't get what he wants, he'll soon change his behavior too.Remember he is only 3.Give him hugs & kisses.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:59 AM on Apr. 26, 2010

  • I've tried the tickle approach as well for ending tantrums (just be careful not to overdo it.. tickling can turn nasty if it goes on too long).. I know it sounds odd but it often works for my son. I'll make funny faces or sounds as well. It just redirects his attention. I've also done hugs. I know my son does get himself overstimulated and can't settle back down. he then moves into lots of physical contact stuff (head-butting, hitting, etc). Holding himand talking calmly to him can help..
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:33 AM on Apr. 26, 2010

  • I put my son in time out when he gets that way. I have also spanked him, and that doesnt seem to work very well. For me, time outs work and when I am at my wits end I go into my room and shut my door. He will cry and scream for a minute, but I will tell him that I am not coming out until he is calmed down. That has worked out more than all of the rest. He seems to be wanting attention when he is at the point of hitting and screaming.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:36 PM on Apr. 26, 2010

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