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Would you date a guy who is seperated from his wife?

The divorce is filed and waiting game now. It is over but he also won't "commit" to me. Keep geeting mixed signals like he wants to be with me but then doesn't. I know his ex's have cheated on him constantly and I really think he's a great guy. Everytime I feel like confronting him with the unsureness I feel about "us" he does something that makes me feel great again (i.e. he asked me to babysit his son for a few hrs this weekend so he could work- to me thats a big deal that he trusts me enough to watch him). He also took me and my 3 kids to dinner afterwards (yes I watched 4 kids....piece of cake lol). Should I just be patient? Never went at relatioships very slowly....so I'm so lost....HELP! :)

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:05 PM on Apr. 26, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (16)
  • There are two side to every story.there has to be a good reason why his wife isn't with him.He'd have all kinds of baggage.I wouldn't.they may work it out and where would that leave you?
    evelynwest

    Answer by evelynwest at 1:08 PM on Apr. 26, 2010

  • With divorce comes a lot of mixed emotions. I would give him some time. He probably has a lot of things to work out on his own before commiting to someone again. Don't push him, just have fun and let things go where they may.
    AK_aries

    Answer by AK_aries at 1:09 PM on Apr. 26, 2010

  • No. The divorce has to be final. And even then - I'd want the divorce to have been final for at least a year giving him time to have completely processed everything.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:10 PM on Apr. 26, 2010

  • Hell no! I would want to see some divorce papers and I mean actually, physically see them before getting involved w/ someone. Usually a guy saying he's separated means he's a liar and then youre stuck b/c the wife finds out and he'll leave you alone just to make things work w/ her. But in your case, do you know for a fact they are filed? If so, he may just want to take things slow. I mean obviously he just got out of a marriage he may not be ready to fully commit.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:10 PM on Apr. 26, 2010

  • No
    ThrivingMom

    Answer by ThrivingMom at 1:11 PM on Apr. 26, 2010

  • He left her and yes, I know for sure they are filed. He's not playing any of those games...
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:13 PM on Apr. 26, 2010

  • Nope. He is still legally married and married = off limits.
    Do you really want to be the rebound girl?
    Give him some time to be single for a while. Chances are he's not going to want to jump from a marriage into another relationship right away and if he does...well I'd be a little concerned about that.
    Laila-May

    Answer by Laila-May at 1:15 PM on Apr. 26, 2010

  • No, I wouldn't. He isn't even free from the last bad relationship, and he does need time to work thru everything and there is always the possibility that they'll get back together.
    And I'd never have any type of relationship with his children as long as he was married because the mother might use that against both of you later and turn it around like he left for you...
    I'm not saying you're wrong, just that it wouldn't be something I'd knowingly get myself in to.
    lisa_ann_p

    Answer by lisa_ann_p at 1:24 PM on Apr. 26, 2010

  • Hell No I wouldn't!
    shamillionaire

    Answer by shamillionaire at 1:28 PM on Apr. 26, 2010

  • Honestly there is only one man that I know that stuck with someone while he was seperated from his wife and going through a divorce and that was my ex husband. He cheated on me with this woman, we seperated,they openly dated, we divorced, they married.
    Then theres my SO that I have been with for 4 years now.He was seperated, going through divorce (this was like 10 years ago),he really is a great guy...he started dating.One girl wanted to get really serious with him and he even told me that she had been a really nice person and all but he just didnt feel like comitting so soon after being married. He wanted some freedom for awhile.That and because his ex wife had cheated on him, he felt there might have been something wwrong with him or something and not good enough for someone else and there was nothing anyone could say at that time to make him think differently.He needed time to heal..for him, it was 6 years of healing.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:37 PM on Apr. 26, 2010

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