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Am I being a bad friend?

Ok so I've known this girl since hs, we are both in our mid 20's now. We were in a realy bad accident that kind of bonded us together I guess you could say. Senior year of hs she had a FULL ride scholarship to go to any college in the state. But she got pregnant and got married and stayed in our rinky dink town. Ended up flunking out of a really good university. I moved away to a university and got married my senior year and stayed up here. Now she has 3 little boys (5, 2 , and 1 ). I've been avoiding her because ALL she does is whine about her life. I'm sorry you don't know what birth control is and you married a lazy bum and now you have out of control kids. I'm just sick of it. And her kids are SOO wild. I don't even like being around them! I'm going to visit my parents next wekend and she wants to hang out.. But I honestly don't even want to see her. I feel like I'm being a bad friend. but I'm just so tired of her!

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:56 AM on Apr. 27, 2010 in Just for Fun

Answers (12)
  • Yeah you think you are better and you are wrong!!!! kicking and bad mouthing your friends while they are down is what i call NOT a real friend.How many kids do you have? you just wait till they act like kids and people start callling them awful.Hopefully you dont carry that "im all that" into your marriege..have you ever thought maybie she tells you stuff because she has noone? omg btw congrats on how you did thing so right .but just so you know theres people way better than you and hopefully they dont look down on you they way you do yours.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:03 AM on Apr. 27, 2010

  • wow... did i ever say i was better than her?? no I didn't. DD is 4 months old. And trust me her kids are little monsters. They are the dirty stinky kids running around in the store and church screaming and yelling while she stands there and does nothing. And I'm sorry, but we have tried to help her out, and she has done nothing but make her situation worse for herself. She just wants people to be there at her beck and call to help her and give her money. She serisouly flat out asked my mom for 1000$ one time because her worthless husband spent all her money. They got almost 10,000$ back on their taxes this year. did they pay bills and catch up on rent that's 6 months behind?? no! They bought a big screen tv and a new computer. and now she's emailing whining about being soooo far behind on bills.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:07 AM on Apr. 27, 2010

  • you do act like your better STOP IT!! she got preggo you didnt you finished college,she lives in a crappy town and you dont.her life sucks your doesnt,her kids suck but yours doesnt.your kid is 4 months,thast too young to say "wonderful' kids are kids dont be so mean about it,but now im actually getting it,she doesnt know how to manage money..say it " girl if we hang out lets do it solo and no whinning im coming to town to visit not be overwhelmed" easy,but really dont bash her.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:14 AM on Apr. 27, 2010

  • Everyone has they're problems. you should try and be there for her. One day your going to be in her shoes and are gonna need someone to be there for you, and guess what? No ones going to be there. Suck it up.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:18 AM on Apr. 27, 2010

  • Aren't you just a rightous bitch! And congrats on having such a perfect life, you must be so proud of yourself. I feel sorry for your friend, not because the way you say her life is. But because she has you as a so called friend.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:28 AM on Apr. 27, 2010

  • I think it's time to cut your losses with this particular friend. It sounds as if you two have nothing in common anymore. To the bashers out there......lighten up!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:58 AM on Apr. 27, 2010

  • no I understand completely!! i have a friend who I love but know that she has become a mom it has been very hard to hang out with because of diffrent parenting styles (very diffrent!!). I love her to death but she allows her son to do things that i do not allow my son to do, and allows him to be mean to my son and just laughs and says how cute!! My son wants to play with him but he takes stuff away and hits him and stuff, and she just laughs. It drives me nuts! I have been avoiding doing things with her with the kids. I feel bad and I have tried to ignore it but my son gets the brunt of it. I completely understand how you would want to step back from a friendship bc of growing appart and bc of the choices someone makes!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:01 AM on Apr. 27, 2010

  • With that attitude I wouldn't call her your friend. Friends listen and support when times are tough or stressful. Friends have empathy. Friends don't kick you when you're down or insult your family. If you've been avoiding her I'm sure she's noticed something is up and either you can learn some tolerance and stay friends with her or just close the book on that friendship.

    Personally I wouldn't want you as my friend if that was how you thought of me I'd rather you just tell me that we've grown apart and have nothing in common anymore so our friendship was basically over.
    Allergic2Stupid

    Answer by Allergic2Stupid at 3:29 AM on Apr. 27, 2010

  • i think maybe you felt inferior to her in high school and are enjoying feeling superior to her now?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:46 AM on Apr. 27, 2010

  • It's kind of hard to be supportive or even feel supportive when someone makes bad choice after bad choice and you HAVE listened and tried to give advice that has been soundly ignored time after time after time.
    You aren't a bad friend, you're just a bad doormat and believe me, that's the problem you want.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:27 AM on Apr. 27, 2010

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