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what would u answer? what would u say if asked is the most important choice a woman.....

....can make in her lifetime? Would u say that the choice of the father of your own children is THE most important?? i was of the opinion that nurture could overcome most anything but lately I think the man who contributed the other half of the DNA for that child has influence that cannot b overcome by all the love and good upbringing/parenting in the world. What do u think --How important is the choice and prehaps the influence of the biological father to the overall outcome of having a well balanced and kind child who will grow up to b a well-balanced productive person for their own lifetime? What do u think and why??

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 8:32 AM on Apr. 27, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (12)
  • Genes CAN play a role in how someone behaves especially if there is any kind of mental problems involved. BUT, all together, i think the upbringing of a child is the most important deciding factor as to how they turn out.


    Answer by samurai_chica at 8:40 AM on Apr. 27, 2010

  • I believe Only woman can think of the future, because they give birth to it in their child. by Maxim Gorky.

    I am with you raising a child, sometimes you fall in love and the person is a good man. When you have a child your whole world changes, and so can your relationship. You have to be strong and willing to battle the bad, and enjoy the good.

    If the world was perfect or we all had crystal globes then we can see our future. We all grow and hopefully the mate you choose grows in the same direction as you.

    Answer by KFree907 at 9:06 AM on Apr. 27, 2010

  • I'm a firm believer in nurture over nature. I don't know if I'd be the same person if I was raised by someone else- I am diagnosed with adult ADD (probably had it my whole life). My mother never medicated me, I did well in school. If I had been medicated I don't think I'd be the same person I am today.
    My son's biological father is a nut-job: borderline schizophrenia, intermittent explosive disorder, bipolar, and ADHD. I would be lying if I said I wasn't worried about my son, who has trouble interacting with children his own age. Hopefully my nurture can overcome most of that nature with therapies and exercises.
    So, in actual answer to your question - no. I don't think it's the most important decision. I think choosing to have children, and raise them to the best of your ability is the most important decision you can make, no matter who the father is.

    Answer by Annabel1809Lee at 9:31 AM on Apr. 27, 2010

  • I think the most important choice a woman can make is to live according to her own truth. As for DNA... my daughter's bio dad is a piece of crap. He's never been a part of her life. He's smart and artistic, but so am I, so I take all the credit for that lol. When she starts acting crazy I wonder if she inherited some mental disease from him. But really, she is more like me than I care to admit then :-) Children are very resilient and they are also their own people. Genetics play a part, but allowing them to be themselves is the best you can do. Besides, it's too late now... move forward with what you've got and what you CAN do something about...

    Answer by figaro8895 at 9:39 AM on Apr. 27, 2010

  • so what would you say to all those people that got abused/neglected/or otherwise screwed over as a child? anyone can overcome any obstacles with the right help and guidance. so unless its a mental or physical disability,bad DNA wont beat out a good upbringing

    Answer by secondtyme520 at 9:48 AM on Apr. 27, 2010

  • OP here--i agree with u annabel but would u have chosen him for yr childs father if u knew all those things? i think u must do your best with your own child after they r born regardless of who fathered them but i do think that we as women should help those of us who havent had kids yet that is DOES make a difference in who fathers that child and sometimes all the nurturing in the world just isnt enough to have a happy healthy child who can b a productive adult. i guess that was what i was thinking when i asked the question. We should never give up for sure. And i do agree that u must also decide to raise what u have to the best of your ability, no matter who the father is too. I wish we could help those women who havent had children as yet to b more carful in who they choose. Love isnt everything and it isnt always the best reason to have a child with a person who isnt together themselves. Tough issue no matter how u lk at it.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:48 AM on Apr. 27, 2010

  • someone have a school paper due?

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:00 AM on Apr. 27, 2010

  • lol school paper, I hope someone else writes it.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:21 AM on Apr. 27, 2010

  • op here-no school paper- an honest question fyi. i really do think that it would b a help to every women who feels that the father does make a big difference to say so to every women who asks if the father and his influence is very important and that in the end being blinded by love isnt an excuse for having a baby with someone who isnt ready or isnt up to the job. as the bearer of the child and the availability of birthcontrol we can have a choice to b careful when deciding to have a baby and we need to b more aware of who is going to have influence over that child-- dna or just because they r present in the childs life. as i said love isnt enough to have a baby without ppp.[prior proper planning]

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:33 AM on Apr. 27, 2010

  • It would b a good question for a paper and i would love to read it.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:35 AM on Apr. 27, 2010

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