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Just wondering how many here have chosen to disconnect from their family?

I don't want to go into great detail, but to keep my sanity I have chosen to not be in contact with my parents and siblings.I am 45.My family is severly disfunctional and when I spend time with them, they constantly are hurtful to me.And hurtful to my son. My husband and son mean the world to me.and we are happy.I just can't be around my parents and siblings.With mother's day coming up, I just wondered how many others out there,have had to make this choice?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:17 AM on Apr. 28, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (11)
  • We have totally disconnected with my husbands family. It was the best decision we ever made.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:22 AM on Apr. 28, 2010

  • i havent spoken to my dad in over a yr. i tried to but he was ugly and its too stressful. I would rather not have stress in my life. My dad feels (and has always felt) that his wife and stepchildren come before me and my brother and sister. He does nice things for them and never for us. He never calls me and is always expecting me to call him.
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 10:28 AM on Apr. 28, 2010

  • We aren't on speaking terms with my SIL- she's full of drama and can't ever just 'let it be'. We really want to keep in contact with her kids, but I'm sure she's twisting the situation to tell them we don't want to see them (she did this to my MIL- she openly said that she has explained to her kids that 'grandma doesn't want to see them' which isn't true at all.)
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:33 AM on Apr. 28, 2010

  • not me. my MIL and my own mom live real far away in another country. sending a gift would be too expensive, but i got custom made picture cards made for both of them and send them. they have already got them and both of them were absolutely delighted !! although i dont really get along with my MIL but i still try my best, and luckily i succeed and make her happy :)
    sadly they got the card way before mothers day (i wanted them to get it on that same weekend the occasion was) , so im going to call both of them too. i hate being disconnected with my family (except for my SIL, she;s just too mean and demanding, my brother-in-law wife thinks so too .. and so do her in-laws) .. but except for getting into conflicts, i try to keep a safe distance from her.i like peace and harmony
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:37 AM on Apr. 28, 2010

  • After my dad passed away, last August, my mother and 2 sisters started s**t with me and I have disowned them. I don't need people like them in my life.
    offrdngal

    Answer by offrdngal at 11:33 AM on Apr. 28, 2010

  • Yep. I moved away. We still visit but I am always anxious to get back home (away).
    rain408

    Answer by rain408 at 11:42 AM on Apr. 28, 2010

  • I haven't spoken to my real Mom's parents or siblings in over 18 months. There's a lot of dysfunctional history there, but the latest thing was that my Grandparents paid for my little bro to take a couple classes at a local community college. I asked her if he had applied for financial aid b/c that could help. She said our Dad "owed him". Well... that really ticked me off b/c NO ONE paid a DIME for ANY of my education. She always talks nasty about my Dad and she's pissed that I have a relationship w/ him. I decided right then and there to cut off contact. It's the best decision I've made in a long time. Like I said, there's a lof of dysfunctional history w/her in particular, but I'm happy I don't talk to any of them.
    Luvmylilmonkies

    Answer by Luvmylilmonkies at 11:50 AM on Apr. 28, 2010

  • I don't speak to my biological father or his family anymore.
    after my parents divorced over 11 years ago, he progressively got more bitter. he just wasn't an enjoyable person to be around, and there was always something more important to him than his kids, (I have a younger brother). After I graduated highschool and went off to college, I rarely got to see him. My husband and I always made attempts to go spend weekends with him....but he never once came to our place to see us. he is also very disrespectful to my mother and things are his way or no way, and I just didn't want to deal with it anymore.
    so last summer things blew up, (about 3 months before my wedding), and long story short, we haven't had contact since, and he never came to my wedding. HOWEVER, I do have a step-father that I love to pieces! he's been with my mother since my parents' divorce, and has been a TRUE father to me. I love him to death.
    carliemarie1015

    Answer by carliemarie1015 at 11:58 AM on Apr. 28, 2010

  • I've cut my mother out of my life. Sometimes it's heartbreaking, but it's for the best. She has nothing positive to contribute to me or my family's life. I don't trust her and she is completely not remorseful for the things she's done or let happen and refuses to take responsibility. All of her apologies have been non-apologies. I just don't have time for her dysfunction/toxicity in me and my kids life!
    nwdeserangel

    Answer by nwdeserangel at 12:01 PM on Apr. 28, 2010

  • we dont talk or associate with my husbands family..for certain reasons..they always cause too much trouble in our marriage and with my sd..its alot easier to stay away..
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:35 PM on Apr. 28, 2010

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