Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Funeral traditions.

I'm in England at the moment for my MIL's funeral which was yesterday. The funeral director wore the traditional long coat and top hat and he walked ahead of the hearst. Also all the neighbours had drawn their curtains in respect.
What kind of traditions do you have?

Answer Question
 
beeky

Asked by beeky at 12:14 PM on Apr. 29, 2010 in Religion & Beliefs

Level 34 (68,345 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • My side is Catholic so we do the wake, church, funeral thing.. Hubby was born in England but thankfully there hasn't been a death in his family since we've been married. I pray we don't anytime soon.
    MrsLeftlane

    Answer by MrsLeftlane at 12:31 PM on Apr. 29, 2010

  • I don't think there's much in the way of traditional clothing, not for my family at least. You wouldn't show up in a flowery sundress, but, otherwise....

    I know that if you see a funeral procession in my area, everyone pulls off the side of the road/stops walking, etc, to pay their respects.
    DusterMommy

    Answer by DusterMommy at 12:34 PM on Apr. 29, 2010

  • Sorry for your loss Beeky.

    My mom and I were discussing this a while ago. We both wish to have a "Celebration of Life" ceremony rather than a funeral. A "Celebration of Life" focuses on the beauty of the person's life. There is "happy" music, photographs and video of the person. Much of the time is spent talking of happy memories. The atmosphere is not solemn, but rather uplifting.

    When I die, this is the way I wish to be said good bye to. There is no need to morn for me.....for me the best is yet to come!
    deedee3849

    Answer by deedee3849 at 12:59 PM on Apr. 29, 2010

  • Most of my family is Catholic, so we always have a wake. As for me though, I do a small "passing" ritual and always place two coins in the coffin as payment for the boatman... I also have a photo album with "Pew cards" and obits along with photos...
    SabrinaMBowen

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 1:05 PM on Apr. 29, 2010

  • Thank you deedee.  It was a beautiful service which did celebrate her life.  The woman who officiated the service spoke about her life, how she met her husband, the interruption of their courtship because of the war, her devotion to her family (4 kids and 10 grandchildren) and how she and my FIL had just celebrated their 60th anniversary last month and their card from the Queen.  I was very lucky to have such an awesome MIL.

    beeky

    Answer by beeky at 1:26 PM on Apr. 29, 2010

  • I dont have any.

    However, when my grandfather died last summer they dressed him in the traditional garb of the LDS people who have been through the temple which is all their temple clothes(all white).

    And since he was retired military he was given the traditional honors of gun salute and folded flag given to my grandma.

    My tradition(when the time comes)will be cremation and simple words said as my ashes are scattered over something pretty and thats what my husband wants too.
    Amaranth361

    Answer by Amaranth361 at 1:30 PM on Apr. 29, 2010

  • OK, along with the Catholic Wake mentioned above...

    In Nebraska (as well as in other rural states, I'm guessing) if a funeral procession drives past a farmer working in the field, he will stop his tractor and stand there respectfully with his hat over his heart.

    And on the "Polka side of the family"...it's kind of become tradition to play and sing "In Heaven There Is No Beer" and raise our brewskis to the deceased.
    MamaK88

    Answer by MamaK88 at 2:34 PM on Apr. 29, 2010

  • The funerals fro my dad, uncle and their dad adn their grandfather were all very much the same open casket, music they loved was played. I think my dads was more a celebration of life we played Scorpions at his funeral lol some people were not happy but my dad loved to make people uncomfortable. We also had a huge get together afterwards and once the non family visitors left the family did what my dad would have done drank, shared, stories, made toast and enjoyed being together.

    For my moms side of the family things are quieter still open casket but sadder somehow, we have only lost my grandmother on that side and she was the rock in our family the true head of the family and the person none of us could ever imagine being without so it was much quieter sadder, and a somewhat traditional mormon service.

    I light candles and put a picture of the person on my mantle, it stays there until I can cope with the loss.
    3_ring_circus_

    Answer by 3_ring_circus_ at 3:33 PM on Apr. 29, 2010

  • Pictures of both my dad and grams are still there, 5 years for my dad and 3 for my grams. I am just not ready yet to move the pictures.
    3_ring_circus_

    Answer by 3_ring_circus_ at 3:33 PM on Apr. 29, 2010

  • In Nebraska (as well as in other rural states, I'm guessing) if a funeral procession drives past a farmer working in the field, he will stop his tractor and stand there respectfully with his hat over his heart.

    In Texas you are expected to stop and remove your hat/bow your head while the procession passes, whether you're driving or on foot. Pity nobody told my parents that when they moved there before the police officer cornered them.

    My mom had regular Catholic wake and mass. My dad had VFW honor corp ceremony- each member marches past the casket/urn slowly, does this very slow controlled salute, then marches off. It doesn't sound like much describing it, it's a you had to be there kind of thing.
    NotPanicking

    Answer by NotPanicking at 7:36 PM on Apr. 29, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.