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I am filled with guilt!

My bff has a 4yo. I have a 3yo. I watch him alot & I just KNOW there is something wrong with him! I know it! I KNOW IT!
His speech, communication, everything is just not up to par. I cant understand 80% of what he says, he doesnt speak in full sentences, or can carry on conversation, he gets confused during alot of instruction, bad eye contact, doesnt like touch, clumsy...

I just feel so GUILTY. Does my BFF not notice! Do they think he will grow out of it? Do they think he is normal?!

I feel horrible because I cannot bring myself to talk to her about. But her & more than anything her son deserve better, they need to be helped! I feel so much guilt. She has family around, why dont they see it? Or do they?
Im around her kid alot, but we rarely have time to be face to face :-(
so the rare moments we are together, its not easy....


Asked by Anonymous at 10:20 PM on Apr. 29, 2010 in Kids' Health

This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • If she is your best friend than why dont you just tell her your concerns? I dont understand friendships that dont involve open communication! If I suspected that something was developmentally wrong with my friends child, I would tell her! And vice versa... if someone suspected that something was off with one of my children, I would want them to tell me. I'm not trying to be rude but I would feel guilty for keeping my mouth shut too. Just say something...she might be put off for a bit but in the long run, if it could benefit her child with an earlier diagnoses then it would be for the better.

    Answer by Jaydin_Makenna at 3:30 PM on Apr. 30, 2010

  • Will he be starting Kindergarten in the fall? If so, I'm sure his teacher will notice. If this your friend's only child, then she may not realize that his behavior is abnormal for his age. Maybe you could suggest speech therapy, if his speech is as bad as you say. The therapist would also pick up on any other delays he may have.

    Answer by JeanetteRene at 10:36 PM on Apr. 29, 2010

  • No, don't wait until someone else notices. If you think he isn't developing properly then you have an obligation to bring it up to your best friend. Just casually mention it to her. See what she's noticed and explain what you've noticed. He is four years old though, it's normal for them to lose attention, have bad eye contact, etc. However, if you honestly think there's something wrong then say it.

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 11:42 PM on Apr. 29, 2010

  • its not like im making him sit & pay attention to me. simple instructions bring confusion to him (hes up in the playhouse with a bat, i tell him to put the bat on the ground -- confused... The only thing he understood was to bring the bat to me & when he gets disciplined i tell him to look at me so i can talk to him.. i feel as if he is looking through me, not at me & it just seems hard for him & he always looks away)

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:02 AM on Apr. 30, 2010

  • He wont start kindergarten until next fall.. so a little over a year :-(
    its her only child, but her siblings have kids around the same age...

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:04 AM on Apr. 30, 2010

  • exactly jayden, but its alot easier said than done....

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:43 AM on May. 1, 2010