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couples counseling?

alright, so ive been with my boyfriend since january 3rd of 2009. i got prego with our son Luca in June and just delivered feb 6th. everything fluctuated with him nothing is steady. for two weeks he'll be awesome and help a ton with the baby. then the next two weeks he'll be a huge ass and barely help. we talk about getting an apartment and eventually getting engaged but holding the wedding off for a while sometimes but i dont think i can marry someone who keeps screwing up then apologizing. a few weeks ago he told me he has a drinking problem. we are both 19 and are staying at his parents house. i want him to take hold of his drinking problem and go to couples counseling with me but he says he'll try and work on the drinking but absolutely not about the counseling. if i try talking to him at home, we just fight. thats why i want to do it.

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momamay2010

Asked by momamay2010 at 2:59 PM on May. 2, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 4 (38 Credits)
Answers (3)
  • My son is 19. In my opinion it is a very rare 19 year old guy who is going to be able to step up, get married, raise a child AND stop drinking, pretty much all at the same time. Guys at that age are not very mature.

    First he has to stop the drinking. if he says he has a problem, then he does. AND what is he going to do about THAT?

    In my opinion you need to move out with your ds. I don't know if you can go home to your parents, or find a place with a responsible roommate, but your bf need to get control of himself before he is ever going to be able to make a commitment to you and your child. If you can see him sober for I don't know....a year?....then maybe start talking about being a couple again.

    Good luck to you all.
    kjrn79

    Answer by kjrn79 at 3:44 PM on May. 2, 2010

  • Couples counseling will definitely help the two of you get along and do what is best for your child.

    Why did the two of you choose to have a child so early in your relationship, and at such a young age?
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 10:09 PM on May. 2, 2010

  • In my experience, I think you should leave. Make a life for yourself and your child. He is still a child. The best predictor of future behavior is past behavior...shoes don't stretch and men don't change! Make a life four you and your child, you don't need his crap. Life is hard enough.
    salexander

    Answer by salexander at 1:48 PM on May. 3, 2010

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