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Do you share your marriage problems with friends?

My friend commented to me the other day that my marriage was perfect. I laughed to myself because we actually argue quite a darn bit. But I believe outwardly that you should project an image of a solid marriage. I have 1 good friend that knows all our silly tiffs but other than that I am very private.

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:52 PM on May. 3, 2010 in Relationships

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Answers (6)
  • I am not married YET.. but I do belive in making an image for your marriage even if its not that image,friends do not need to know if your marriage is on the rocks or if it is "perfect" I DONT like people knowing my business or commenting on my relationships when they need to worry baout theirs..
    mommy16love

    Answer by mommy16love at 1:55 PM on May. 3, 2010

  • Same here...I have one great friend who listens to everything I need to say and I, in return, listen to her. Its a great friendship and I would only tell her, no one else because Im a very private person when it comes to my marriage.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:54 PM on May. 3, 2010

  • I did that with my first marriage. I was young and didn't really understand what it really meant to be married. I shared with all of my friends and family every single little fight that we had. For a while things got better but for some reason my family refused to see what a "good guy" he'd become. After a while I realized that the reason they had formed this opinion of him was because of everything I had told them. They'd never heard a single one of his good qualities because apparently those weren't worth talking about.

    I learned the second time around that your marriage should be a private affair. Not that you shouldn't have someone you talk to, but not everything is worth talking about and not everyone is worth talking to. My friends are pretty convinced that my marriage is perfect and there are days when I think so too but I do know we have our moments when our communication skills are far from pristine.
    sillyt

    Answer by sillyt at 1:59 PM on May. 3, 2010

  • I used to tell my now 'ex bestfriend' everything about me and my partner, all the problems, fights, ect. She always ended up somewho turning what I was saying about me, into her. And how 'perfect' her relationship was. I always got so sad, and depressed. Best friends should make you feel better, not worse.
    I now, havn't talked to her in a year. And I feel so much better. I dont have to compair relationships with her, and feel the gossip between us and our lives was the cause of my unhappyness. And stress! I feel so much happy'r keeping my life private. I cant think for myself, other then follow bad advice from friends about what i should do.
    Kepping relationships, private, and between you and your partner.. is really the way to go. : )
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:05 PM on May. 3, 2010

  • Im with you, I remember being told before I was married that you love eachother, you will fight and forgive, but your loved ones might very well stay upset with your spouse. Not to mention they will always take your side, and may remain angry for a long time. I wont talk to my friends or family about our problems, (although I do talk to cafemom friends about it)
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:05 PM on May. 3, 2010

  • Just fix your problems with that person. If you have a really close friend you want advice from that is OK. But steer clear of family and telling just anyone. It's hard for family to like a spouse if their relative is telling them bad stuff.
    SylviaNCali

    Answer by SylviaNCali at 4:47 PM on May. 3, 2010

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