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What would you do?

I usually hate relationship questions and now I am writing one. lol. Okay so I feel my SO and I are not nearly as close as we used to be. We don't really talk about anything meaningful. Well our daughter has meaning but I guess I mean about our feelings and stuff. He tells me he loves me more than ever but he doesn't even cuddle with me unless I ask. Another part of this is I had absolutely no sex drive for a long time and he would beg me. Now it has come back and he says I am pushing it so much that he isn't interested. I keep trying to talk about making our sex life better and being more open and he says I am now smothering him. He won't let me talk about anything. I am getting so frustrated in many ways. Any advice on how to get him to realize how important this is to me? I have been crying a lot lately because I am so unhappy and he just tells me to stop. And I just realized I am making him sound like a jackass.

Answer Question
 
xredstarsx

Asked by xredstarsx at 8:05 PM on May. 3, 2010 in Relationships

Level 10 (436 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • Honestly feeling and emotions wax and wan. It is impossible to be head over heels in love all the time, if we were we would never get any work done and jealously would run rampant. I say chill out, he loves you. I mean he stood by you in pregnancy, and through your own decreased sex drive. Now its your turn to do the same.
    Instead of demanding have you tried wooing him. Maybe a date night, where you both just relax and enjoy one another. Good Luck and don't give up.
    FuzNet

    Answer by FuzNet at 8:13 PM on May. 3, 2010

  • Back off and make him come to you for sex! He said you are smothering him so act uninterested and eventually he will come around, if he doesn't I would do some investigating on his computer and phone to make sure he is not cheating.

    kjfamily

    Answer by kjfamily at 8:15 PM on May. 3, 2010

  • sit down with NO distractions after your dd has gone to bed and just TALK.

    it helps.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:24 PM on May. 3, 2010

  • The act uninterested thing probably wont work as he got used to having sex like once every two weeks and now I would like it close to everyday. And I know he isn't cheating but he likes porn and masturbating more than he used to because I was so turned off I would tell him to. And I know if I tried to just spend an evening with him he would just want to play X box. We have been together 5 years and I guess I just miss the closeness and passion we once had. I can't tell you the last time he even focused on me in bed. It is over in 15 minutes or less no matter what I want. For the first time in my life I want to cheat but I never would.
    xredstarsx

    Answer by xredstarsx at 8:28 PM on May. 3, 2010

  • I have been together with my DH for 8 years. I can honestly say we have lost the passion at times. When that happens you have to find it again. Get out of the house. Don't try wooing him at home, too many distractions. Relationships require work and maintenance.
    FuzNet

    Answer by FuzNet at 9:37 PM on May. 3, 2010

  • It sounds like he is getting out of the relationship, exactly what he is putting into it.
    GMMOLLY

    Answer by GMMOLLY at 7:58 AM on May. 4, 2010

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