Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Do you think "Gays" can be as good/better parents as straight couples?

I am going to be a surrogate. I meet my intended parents next week. The only info I was given was two names. My guess- They are both male. Although I know Terry/Terri COULD be a female..

I have no problem carrying for two men, two woman, a single parent. Ect.
But Im looking to see what everyone else thinks-

Do you think sexual orientation will make them better/worse parents? Do you think every child NEEDS a mom & dad?


Asked by pinkcicle709 at 6:16 PM on May. 4, 2010 in Babies (0-12 months)

Level 15 (2,168 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (43)
  • I agree with many of the PPs... a gay couple can't "accidentally" have a baby, so obviously they have talked it over and know they are ready, unlike many straight couples who have a surprise and need to readjust their entire lives in a very short time to accomodate. (and I mean no disrespect to anyone who's had a surprise!)
    Also the adoptive gay couple will be under more severe scrutiny than biological parents get- not necessarily because they are gay, but adoptive parents have to go through a LOT of case studies, trials and trivulations to be approved to adopt, and I believe they are checked on periodically for awhile. (Feel free to correct me if that's wrong).
    I think gay parents are capable of being just as good, or as bad, as any other combination- mom & dad, single mom, single dad, older sibling, grandma, whoever. It depends on the person raising the child, not whom they choose to have sex with.

    Answer by Koukla12905 at 8:44 PM on May. 4, 2010

  • i dont think its there sexual orientation that is the problem, and i think they serperatley can be good parents - but i do think that a child needs/should have a mother and father. i think they need that male & female attention, they especially need that same sex parent to relate too.
    its a sad situation because i have no problems with gays, and i think that they should be able to be parents. its not something anyone should be forced to go without, but i dont think its fair to the kid to not have a mother and father - so im not sure what i would do if i was you. sometimes i feel like maybe they should be limited to the children in foster homes because a home is better then no home, but im not sure a father-father or mother-mother home is better then a mother-father home.

    Answer by PURPULbutterfly at 6:19 PM on May. 4, 2010

  • I don't think that it would make them "better" parents just because they are gay.
    But it wouldn't mean that they would be "bad" parents either.
    Just talk to them, see if you like them, just as you would a hetero couple.

    Answer by kimberlyinberea at 6:22 PM on May. 4, 2010

  • In todays world alot of kids end up with only a MOTHER. So wouldnt TWo Father's who REALLY want them be better than a mother Who "Ended up" with them?

    Answer by pinkcicle709 at 6:22 PM on May. 4, 2010

  • I definitely think they can be great parents, just like straight couples. Really any couple that would go through the heartache and jump through the hoops of having a baby through means like surrogacy would appreciate that child and probably be better parents than most.

    Answer by JulieJacobKyle at 6:26 PM on May. 4, 2010

  • Yes, they can be as good or better parents than straight couples. I do believe that kids should have a positive role model of both sexes, but that doesn't have to be mom or dad, it can be the same sex parents and an aunt or uncle or grandparents or family friends. To me a stable home with same sex parents is better than an unstable home with straight parents. Parenting is not about gender or sexual orientation, it's about the kids and providing them with their needs.

    Answer by canadianmom1974 at 6:26 PM on May. 4, 2010

  • I agree with Kimberly- talk with them and see what you think- even address your concern of no female in the picture and see what they say-you may find they would be wonderful or horrible and it may have nothing to do with being gay.

    Answer by soyousay at 6:27 PM on May. 4, 2010

  • kids need both sexes to influence them. i don't really have an opinion on gay couples parenting, as long as the child has consistent, positive influence from both sexes.


    Answer by bestmommyeber at 6:27 PM on May. 4, 2010

  • I ended up with my kids suppose, although I got widowed. That said, the same could possibly happen to them. I doubt the surviving parent would refer to it in that way.

    There are some really lousy straight parents out there so it only stands to reason there are some really lousy gay parents as well. Same as there can be wonderful parents out there. Their sexuality has no bearing on how they'll parent.

    Answer by Ginger0104 at 6:29 PM on May. 4, 2010

  • i don't think it would matter and no i don't think every child "needs" a mom and a dad. Its good to have male and female type influences but a mom can play both roles and a dad can play both roles if they have to.

    Answer by shay1130 at 6:36 PM on May. 4, 2010