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Am I expecting too much from my 7 year old?

(long story, short) My 7 year old had a really hard time learning to behave at school, he thought he was the boss and wanted to do what HE wanted to do (in a nutshell)...well over the last couple of months he seems to have finally settled in and found his place at school. We've worked hard with him, his teacher and his principal and it seems to have paid off. We are THRILLED! ...and now for the big "BUT". Just as his behavior at school has improved he suddenly has become SO messy and lazy at's an example - today I brought him a new toothbrush, I went upstairs and he had taken it out of it's packaging and threw the trash on the floor and left it there. Then he took a bath and I told him to bring his clothes down to the laundry, so he brings it downstairs but instead of throwing it in the hamper he tosses it on the's like he thinks he doesn't have to put effort anywhere but at school now..(cont.)

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Asked by stepmom929 at 9:14 PM on May. 4, 2010 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Level 12 (920 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • I know kids will be kids, but I am really getting annoyed with his laziness. Is he just being atypical 7 year old or does he need some more strick rules to follow with consequences??? I am so relieved that his school issues seem to have passed I hate to give him a hard time about this now....advice??

    Answer by stepmom929 at 9:15 PM on May. 4, 2010

  • well...i don't know your child, but i do know some 7 year olds. was he rewarded for his progressing behavior in school?


    Answer by bestmommyeber at 9:17 PM on May. 4, 2010

  • Hmm. I guess this is a good time to say "pick your battles". If you think him doing well at school is better than him not being messy at home than I wouldn't push the issue if it isn't a really big deal. However, I don't see how simply reminders to pick up after himself could hurt any. Regardless of how well he has done thus far he will still always need guidance and instruction.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:19 PM on May. 4, 2010

  • Yes, when he behaves at school he has the option to use all his toys, games, watch a tv show, etc....when he doesn't behave he has certain it's kind of like now that he has so many options of things to do when he gets home he doesn't take ANY time to pick up because he's too busy playing...I think picking your battles makes some sense..I guess I can just keep reminding him and calling him back to do the things he doesn't do properly. I guess I just get tired of telling him the same thing over and over.

    Answer by stepmom929 at 9:23 PM on May. 4, 2010

  • He's being a typical kid. If you keep making a fuss over his "bad" behavior, then he won't ever make an effort to improve. Catch him being good.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:41 PM on May. 4, 2010

  • I agree with Anon 9:19 in that you should pick your battles. Of course tell him when he's wrong, remind him to clean up after himself, etc. But I wouldn't go crazy over it...I too have a 7 year old son and this behavior is very normal. The way I see it is I rather you be a problem for me at home than in school. Keep reminding him, giving him pep talks and try a reward/chore chart for him at home. Good luck!

    Answer by NJMom2Tyler at 10:55 PM on May. 4, 2010

  • You are not asking too much. I don't fall for that "kids will be kids" BS. Kids will be the kind of kids we allow them to be. If he is allowed to be lazy at home, he will be. If you don't like it, don't allow it.

    Answer by Pnukey at 9:26 AM on May. 5, 2010

  • Pick your battles? Seriously? No wonder kids feel entitled to everything and think the world should revolve around them. So because he is doing well in school he doesn't have to remember nit to throw his trash on the ground? Thats pretty much like saying he only has to give 50% in life. Try in some areas but not in others. That is setting him up for failure as an adult imo.

    Answer by MrsSamMerlotte at 10:02 AM on Apr. 11, 2013

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