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Preschool child and "Masturbation" ???

So my daughter is apparently masturbating. Not with her hands, but by rubbing against objects. I was told a year ago by her pedi that it's normal, there is nothing sexual about it, she just found a new "thing" that feels good so naturally she is going to keep doing it and that it will pass. Well she got over it for a while but now a year later she has started doing it again. She used to only do it in grocery baskets, stroller, carseat, and any other situation where she has a strap or bar between her legs. Now she just doesn't care, she does it on the couch, in my son's bouncy chair, and gets frustrated when she cant do it in the car because she only has a lap belt on now. I was told to ignore it but i'm finding it hard to do!! Especially when we are in public because its so obvious what shes doing! Her face gets all red and she pants and gets into it. How can I break her of this or when will it FINALLY stop!!??


Asked by Anonymous at 10:59 AM on May. 5, 2010 in Preschoolers (3-4)

This question is closed.
Answers (29)
  • MY DD is 2 and she does that to the corner of the coffee table, couch, and bed. It is normal for this age...but def. embarrassing....lately we say to her no hump(humping) give hugs and for some weird reason she will run over and stop for a few min. I wish I could give you an answer but I do believe they will grow out of it.....just be patient! Good Luck!

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:38 PM on May. 5, 2010

  • You explain to her that she needs to do that in private, not in front of everyone. When she is doing it, tell her to go to her room. It is a natural thing. Don't ever make her feel bad for it or ashamed. That could cause more harm than good. She is old enough to understand what you mean when you have her go to her room or in the bathroom.

    Answer by BradenIsMySon at 11:04 AM on May. 5, 2010

  • My mom said I did it too. She just calmly explained to me that it's a natural thing to do, but it's for private only. My daughter likes to touch herself now and I tell her the same thing.

    Answer by Cassidhes_Mom at 12:04 PM on May. 5, 2010

  • I did that when I was little and I still do actually. Its the only way I can have an orgasm. I remember doing it all the time when I was younger, and one time my mom caught me and spanked me. After that I tried to hide every time I did it but my mom always knew what I was doing. She never said anything to me about it though that I can remember. I would just tell her to do it in private. Go in her room or something. Its not bad, and I know it must be weird to think of your little girl doing that but please don't make her feel bad about it. Just tell her she needs to do it in private, not in front of other people. And I was NOT molested BTW. She probably just rubbed up against something one day and realized it felt good.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:06 PM on May. 5, 2010

  • At that age she is old enough to understand privacy- explain to her that some things are only done in private- when she is alone. Rather than ignoring it, when she does it in public I would just remind her by saying "Please stop- you're in public. That's a private thing." If you reinforce it, over time she should get it. HTH!

    Answer by Freela at 11:14 AM on May. 5, 2010

  • I would tell her "NO" and make her stop. Thats just embarressing.
    I know the new thing out there is to just let kids do it and not make them feel shamed of thier bodies...whatever. It makes me and other people around uncomfortable and I would make her stop when in public.
    If she does it at home, cart her into her room and tell her if thats what she wants to do then do it here and close the door.
    There is a time and place for everything and for THAT...PUBLIC is NOT the time or place.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:43 AM on May. 5, 2010

  • Um never dealt with that with 2 girls and 2 boys?!?!


    Answer by Anonymous at 12:15 PM on May. 5, 2010

  • it will feel good when your daughter is experiencing hormone spikes. my first thought always was molestation, but apparrently your dd has been doing it, and is remembering. start teaching her about privacy, and doing it in public. you can't stop your kid from doing it, but you can tell them it is inappropriate to do in front of others. heaven forbid she do it around/with other children.

    your pedi can guide you into some investigation to possible molestation, but im sure there is nothing to worry about. she is not to young to learn modesty.

    good luck.

    Answer by hard_hat_mommie at 12:25 PM on May. 5, 2010

  • My first thought was molestation too... Because i was molested at a young age and also masturbated to that point very young, it never stopped, I have always masturbated. I did it in public but also tried to hide it at the sane time, like under a school desk, on a bus, ect... Its kinda sad because i wish i had never felt that til I was older. Its affected alot of my sexual life as well. Are you sure she wasnt touched even once by anyone?

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:46 PM on May. 5, 2010

  • Well I am a SAHM and my daughter is always in my care except for going to preschool 3 hours a day. But this started long before preschool started.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:52 PM on May. 5, 2010