Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

How to know when your ready to be a parent?

The question has gone over and over in my head. My husband and I have talked about it a lot and going back and forth to weather we try more to get pregnant or just wait. We will be married for 4 years next week and together almost 10 years. We have been trying for 5 months but haven't got pregnant yet. I have been scared to keep trying because I'm not sure I'm ready. We want to finish the basement and I would love to loose more weight. But I'm wondering if that is excuses for myself. I really want one and so does my husband. So how do you know your ready?

Answer Question

Asked by SmallRiver22 at 11:44 AM on May. 9, 2010 in Trying to Conceive

Level 2 (10 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • lol. i dont think your actually ready to be a mom till you hold your little one...even the whole 9 months my dd was in my tummy i was woundering am i gonna be a good mom, what if im not ready but when u have you little its like a light switch goes of and you go into mommy mode and you know exactally what to do. thats what happened to me anyways! Good Luck

    Answer by mommylisar at 11:48 AM on May. 9, 2010

  • I think when you are both "satisfied" with your lives--your marriage is strong, you've completed your educations, you've established your careers, you have a home...basically, it's when you feel "settled," yet there is that one little thing that is missing...a child!

    At least that's how my husband and I thought of things when we decided to start a family.

    If there are still things you want to accomplish before starting a family, that's your decision, and I think you SHOULD do those things, so that you're not left wondering, "what if we did this...or what if we did that...?"

    Answer by LoriKeet at 11:51 AM on May. 9, 2010

  • I dont think anyones ever ready for mother hood its all soooo UNPREDICTABLE theres no possible way to really prepare for it! until the little babies there and you have to do whatever it is that needs to be done

    Answer by mommy16love at 11:55 AM on May. 9, 2010

  • u get prgnant and deal with what is thrown ur way.... good uck

    Answer by mirit.rose at 12:09 PM on May. 9, 2010

  • You can be ready financially but you can never be ready emotionally or mentally because you don't know what kinds of things motherhood really throws at you. I found that out when I had my DD. I found out unexpectedly that I was pregnant and as the pregnancy went on, I thought I was ready for it all. Having a child throws feelings at you that you never knew you were capable of feeling & it's a wonderful thing. It also turns most into different people. It has changed my life forever but definately for the best.
    If you think you are materialistically & financially ready to add a baby to your family, go for it! Pregnancy does result in weight gain for most, so that's something to think about if you want to lose weight now.

    Answer by Marix3 at 12:09 PM on May. 9, 2010

  • honestly, and from personal experience, you're ready when you don't have to question whether you're ready. I allowed myself to agree to try based on sound, logical reasons...guess what. I'm really really struggling with it now that I am. I totally disagree about being emotionally or mentally ready. You can be those things, even if you don't fully know the reality of having a child. Being emotionally ready to get pregnant is a wholly different thing from knowing what's its like to have a child. The first is just the pure desire in your heart and it really needs to be there if you're going to get pregnant. If you have emotional reservations, you really need to wait until the desire hits. You don't want the guilt of being pregnant and still not sure you want this. trust me.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:14 PM on May. 9, 2010

  • I think we are ready in a finacial and emotinal ways, we'll be married 2 years in july and this is what we both want. :) i know its not going to be a boat ride out to paradise but i think having a baby will complete us in all the ways possible :)

    Answer by bmdred at 12:17 PM on May. 9, 2010

  • when you are financally and emtionally ready. I had my kids young and i wish i would have waited. So before you get pregnant make sure you are ready to handle the responsiblility. It sound like you are not ready to me. If you are not sure then wait. Maybe you need a little more time.

    Answer by symle456 at 12:26 PM on May. 9, 2010

  • We where ready when i got pregnant. There is no perfect time or being ready.

    Answer by Nemhs at 12:50 PM on May. 9, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.