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Did you ever have someone gush over one of your kids while the other just sat there?

I hate when people do this. I went in to pay our car insurance this morning and our agent was talking to my boys. He kept saying to my two year old, you are cute, I like your hair, etc. while my three year old was sitting there. Now, of course both my boys are very cute and adorable, but people always gush over the two year old. He has big, bright blue eyes with long lashes and beautiful curly hair. My three year old has blue eyes as well and just straight, normal hair. They really look nothing alike. Anyway, it just bothers me when people do this. Do they not realize that the other child is listening? They may be little but they know you are paying more attention to the other child. Would you say something to the person?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:25 PM on May. 10, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (10)
  • This always happened to me when I had my daughter. People used to comment on her all the time while my 7 year old just sat there. It really bothered me also. You could try to bring the other into the conversation, but that gets awkward. I guess it's best to just try to get out of there as fast as you can.
    mompam

    Answer by mompam at 2:32 PM on May. 10, 2010

  • I usually would just say something like: yep he is so cute, just like his brother, both are good at building blocks and love to swim. "3 year old" is so helpful with his little brother too...

    Usually if you nicely add in the other child the person speaking will compliment the other without even catchin on that you noticed...know what I mean?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:33 PM on May. 10, 2010

  • Yes!! It drives me nuts. My daughter is 3 and son just turned a year. When we go out places they are always making comments about HOW CUTE the "baby" is. Luckily my daughter is a little bit too young to notice it the way that I do, but I think that both my children are beautiful and deserve just as much attention as the other
    Ctink8189

    Answer by Ctink8189 at 2:33 PM on May. 10, 2010

  • I am the only girl in my fam and it used to really hurt my feelings when people would say "Oh my! Look at all those beautiful boys! They just have the prettiest eyes and lashes I've ever seen!" and I'd be standing there... in a dress... unmistakably a girl... with a horrified look b/c they NEVER looked at me. OMG it still bothers me b/c I felt so overlooked!
    Luvmylilmonkies

    Answer by Luvmylilmonkies at 2:33 PM on May. 10, 2010

  • This happened with me as a child. I'm an identical twin and everything thought my twin and I were the bees knees. My poor older sister was always ignored. I felt bad even from an early age. She always clung to the fact that she was older than us - that was the one thing she had over us. It's nice of you to be aware of your other child and I'm sure you do a good job of reassuring him, too!
    mickstinator

    Answer by mickstinator at 2:36 PM on May. 10, 2010

  • yes, people always gravitate toward my younger son and my older one ALWAYS picks up on it. It's sad.
    jeanclaudia

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 2:41 PM on May. 10, 2010

  • I would just say "Thanks they are both very sweet"
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:18 PM on May. 10, 2010

  • Yes its happened.

    Usually I bring up something the other one did or I give the other ones a pat on the back for something.
    Amaranth361

    Answer by Amaranth361 at 3:32 PM on May. 10, 2010

  • well I have a 2, 5 and 6 yr old so who do people compliments...The 2 yr old of course! She still has that cute baby stage and she is tiny so people just always say how cute she is how she looks like a doll. My 5 and 6 yr old are adorable just not in that cute baby stage anymore.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:47 PM on May. 10, 2010

  • I have that same problem. People come out of the woodwork to tell me that my daughter has beautiful eye's and my son is just sitting there. I know he doesn't notice but still...
    But_Mommie

    Answer by But_Mommie at 3:48 PM on May. 10, 2010

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