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I am exhausted with HIS family - this needs to stop NOW!!!

OK, So I and my boyfriend of 7 years (we are both 28) had a baby, unplanned - as most seem to be now...Anyways his family to me is completely selfish, unorganized, and has never really been nice/close to me. Our baby, now 17 mo old, has now made it a living hell on 'sharing' him. Here's the newest drama; his partying sister is comming in town and facebook messaged me (no phone call) that she will be in town at the end of month and wanted to 'take him for a day'. She has seen him a total of 3 times since he has been born and her mother has seen himmaybe 6 (she lives 10 min away) so I said no prob but I will be joining because of his age and not knowing her....AND she drives a MINI COOPER...car seat no fit...NOW its been twisted that I've been denying his family from seeing him - REALLY?! Please ANY input would be great because my side agreed that it would be better - its not like hes older and knows her?!

Answer Question
 
BubbaHunter1208

Asked by BubbaHunter1208 at 5:09 AM on May. 11, 2010 in Toddlers (1-2)

Level 2 (11 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • I would Facebook her back and say you can come visit my child. But you are not taking him anywhere.
    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 5:38 AM on May. 11, 2010

  • I agree. He's YOUR CHILD. You don't need to answer to anyone else. You're not married. They aren't your inlaws. He's YOUR CHILD. You are the parent. You make the rules. Remember that.
    flaggot13

    Answer by flaggot13 at 6:06 AM on May. 11, 2010

  • Even if they were in laws no way is some one I don't know like the back of my hand taking my kid some where in their car. Not happening. Why can't she take him for the day with you there? This is something you need to stick to your guns on! You are absolutely right and thats that!
    gfargas

    Answer by gfargas at 6:23 AM on May. 11, 2010

  • Just because they are Grandparents and Aunts and Uncles doesnt give them any right to YOUR child! Tell her its your way or no way and tell the rest that if they cared enough to see him that they would get over themselves and see him!
    SabrenaLeigh

    Answer by SabrenaLeigh at 7:15 AM on May. 11, 2010

  • The way I see it, if you can't be nice to me, why am I going to be comfortable with letting someone take my child anywhere?It's kinda obvious to me,' so if they can't see it, point that out.You are totally rite-on!
    Stefono

    Answer by Stefono at 7:56 AM on May. 11, 2010

  • You're going to have to make your expectations known & stick to your guns. Obviously complaining and manipulating have worked for them in the past otherwise they would've found a different way to get what they want. Tell his sister that a face book message is not an appropriate contact for this type of subject. Then tell her that you don't let your son ride w/ ppl who drive toy wind up cars bc if she gets into an accident is a pretty sure death for your son. My inlaws are very controlling and manipulative. I've had to say "because she's my child & I get to raise her how I want" several times. There have also been a couple of situations where I had to be the bitch for the better of my child. You're the mamma, stand your ground! Might create problems now but will make things soooooo much easier in the long run. Good luck! I think they should start an in law relocation program like witness protection lol!
    Nyx7

    Answer by Nyx7 at 8:02 AM on May. 11, 2010

  • You're the mamma, stand your ground! Might create problems now but will make things soooooo much easier in the long run

    As a BTDT Momma, O have to totally agree with that! It was hard for me, but once they understood is was my way or the highway, they pretty much stopped trying to bully me. Do they like me? No! Do they sasy bad things about me? Probably! But I don't care anymore! I'm going to do what I see is fit, and their opnion doesn't change me anymore.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:18 AM on May. 11, 2010

  • he's YOUR baby, you have the right to want to go along. if she is offended she'll have to get over it. How does going for the ride deny her of a visit? It would be different if she was in your son's life
    Owl_Feather

    Answer by Owl_Feather at 10:00 AM on May. 11, 2010

  • TO F-ing bad.. seriously.. this is your baby.. who cares what they think you are doing, YOU know that you are doing this for the safety of your child, regardless of how they twist it around... My in laws can be like that too and I just don't play in to it.. they can visit but not take my son! period. I don't trust them or how they'd care for him if I wasn't around.. too bad!
    maxsmom11807

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 10:41 AM on May. 11, 2010

  • Something sounds very fishy. I would NOT let him go. Suggest to her she can spend the day with your child as long as you can be there too and don't take your eyes off your child.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:29 AM on May. 11, 2010

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