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Is Your Hubby A Work-Aholic?

We have a 4 year old, and are expecting a baby in November. My husband has always worked a lot in the short 4 years we've been married. His dad was the same way. always at work and never home. His dad regrets it now that all the kids are grown up and gone. He says he feels like he missed out on everything because he was so worried about making a living FOR them he didn't get to make a life WITH them. My hubby says he doesn't feel like he's missing out on anything, but he only went to 2 of our sons soccer games and now he's done playing soccer. He missed his first day of preschool. I feel like he's missing out on so much and he's never going to get it back. Are there any other hubby's out there like this? I wish my husband wouldn't work so much, I just want him home with us at night. How do I get him to understand he may regret this later? He's never going to get this time back with me or the kids!

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:49 PM on May. 11, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • yes i have a four yr old and a 2 yr old. and he does tend to work alot n when he is home he's so tired that he doesnt really get to spend to much time with the kids. and i have tried to explain to him i didnt have a lot of time growin up with my dad. and my dad regrets it. and i think he gets that from his father cause he wasnt around alot growing up, his mom was. idk what to cause i cant seem to get through him to understand how much he is missing.
    greenegurls

    Answer by greenegurls at 8:51 PM on May. 11, 2010

  • My dh is sort of like that. He just has a really strong work ethic that I find appealing and makes me feel safe and taken care of :) I use to get sort of worried about things like "first day of school" stuff....until I realized that that was MY thing. I personally enjoy doing things like that...not that he doesn't love our kids...he just shows it in different ways.

    But that all being said, a little bit of give is good too, like taking off for a few things here and there...know what I mean. You cant expect him to be there for everything....but he shouldn't expect to NEVER come to anything either.

    Compromise :) I know, easier said than done. LOL Talk to him and tell him how important it is for the kids to see that dad is involved and thinks their things are important too. Good luck ;)
    mom2twobabes

    Answer by mom2twobabes at 8:53 PM on May. 11, 2010

  • My Hubby's gone 4-6 weeks at a time working, he's self employed so when he's home it's about 2 weeks at a time. I hate that he misses out on things, but we also don't want to live in a cardboard box.. We are adults, and have bills. We don't live beyond our means, but like to be comfortable. I also get to stay home and be there for our boys 24/7, so it's worth it to us... I think you should be thankful your Hubby has a job, and likes to work. Just imagine if he didn't have a good work ethic, and say on his butt all day... What kind of example would that be for your children??
    MrsLeftlane

    Answer by MrsLeftlane at 8:56 PM on May. 11, 2010

  • Sat*
    MrsLeftlane

    Answer by MrsLeftlane at 8:57 PM on May. 11, 2010

  • Don't get me wrong MrsLeftlane, I am very grateful that my husband has a job, I know so many people that are struggling right now. And we feel the same as you, we don't want to live in a cardboard box or struggle. We don't live beyond our means either and are comfortable. I don't stay home 24/7 with our kids. I work 3- 12 hour shifts on the weekends, and I am home every night to put our son to bed. And I don't HAVE to work, I CHOOSE to work so we can live comfortable. I just feel like he's missing out on a lot and I don't want him to regret it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:01 PM on May. 11, 2010

  • my hubby is sort of like that. he doesn't work ALL the time...but when they're extra hours available at work, he's working. he does still get a few days off or so a week, so I don't usually feel like he's "never home."

    but he's DETERMINED to make a good living for his family. and I couldn't be more thankful for that. I love that he's so passionate about taking care of his family. as long as he makes the best of time he does get to be home, I'm okay with it.

    he's still a wonderful husband, and an amazing father.
    carliemarie1015

    Answer by carliemarie1015 at 10:52 PM on May. 11, 2010

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