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Do you agree that being a SAHM should stop once the children reach school age?

I was just wondering what your views are on this. I am currently working on school and plan to go back to work once my kiddos are in school (full time). I just don't see the point in sitting around the house all day once the kids are in school. My Aunt got really used to the SAHM life, which is fine if that is what she chooses, but her kids are 17, 10, and 8. They are constantly borrowing money from people because they cannot make ends meet at the end of the month when the money starts running low. I just don't understand how she can be "comfortable" doing this when she has every opportunity to work during the day, even if it's only part time. I know what your going to say.. "Its none of your business!" Your absolutely right.. it really isn't my business. But in general I just wanted to see how other women feel about this.


Asked by Ctink8189 at 10:43 AM on May. 12, 2010 in Just for Fun

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Answers (125)
  • I would have gone back to work if there was a need of any kind, but there wasn't. My kids are grown and one out of three lives on her own, but knows for a fact that since I am a housewife, that I am always available for anything that might come up and I am the one they turn to, and I feel blessed for being there in their time of need, and I am not talking money wise, although that too is possible but doing things for them when they have no time to do. I was there for every major event in school, never missing a thing because I had to work, to me that was priceless, and even if I had to cut down money wise to do it, I would have done the same.

    Answer by older at 11:34 AM on May. 12, 2010

  • I have mixed feelings about this. If you would've asked me this two years ago I would've said (for me personally) yes I will go back to work, BUT now my DH makes REALLY good money! We can afford to go on nice trips, I could travel with him, he can usually get the time off he wants so why would I want to have a job that may hold us back, you know. We really don't need the money so why take a job that somebody else might really want or really need.
    Right now I volunteer while I'm a SAHM so I still get out and still have a "job" and although I take it seriously there is still not much commitment so i just may continue volunteering after my children are done with school.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:48 AM on May. 12, 2010

  • If they can financially support themselves, then why not? If they are borrowing money all the time (and not paying it back), then mom should really consider a job, even just something part-time while kids are in school.

    Answer by CaLizzyMom at 10:49 AM on May. 12, 2010

  • I think as long as the family is ok then it doesn't really matter.

    Answer by jedwards2009 at 10:46 AM on May. 12, 2010

  • Not if your family can afford to keep you a SAHM.

    I can understand getting comfortable with the SAHM lifestyle. I'm one myself. I'm working towards becoming a cop so I don't want to be a SAHM forever. However if I wanted to, I most likely could financially. If for any reason that changed in my household needed me to work. There'd be not one question about it.

    She should probably start of with a light work load to ease her way into the workforce again, get her body used to it again, before going full throttle.

    Answer by Skepticchick at 10:49 AM on May. 12, 2010

  • I'm not sure. I ALWAYS thought Moms should return to work when their kids go to school. And I have told my family that I plan on doing that. BUT, now that the day looms closer (my youngest is now 5) I am having trouble figuring out how to make it work. And with unemployment SO HIGH in my area, my schedule needs don’t exactly put me at the top of the application piles!!

    I need:

    Monday-Friday, NO weekends.

    7:30-3:00, NO extra hours

    School half days, holidays, school breaks, weather days, teacher work days, I can not work any of those!

    Sick days for my kids, sick days for me

    Hospital days for my middle child (only about 1 a month, and maybe 1 week long visit each year)

    I do want to work. Who do you think might hire me? (the schools are laying OFF people at the moment, not hiring, otherwise that might work!)

    Answer by VeronicaLee at 10:50 AM on May. 12, 2010

  • Okay good answers.. and let me be clear on this.. I have nothing against women who stay at home after their kids are in school, EXCEPT when they cannot pay their bills to begin with. If we could afford to keep up this lifestyle then i'd probably do it too and find a hobby but I know that we can't. We think our kiddos are expensive as babies, YEA RIGHT. The expensive part comes when they get older and more choosy about the clothes they wear, the activities they are in, and the things they want. If it takes me going back to work to be able to provide all of this then I def will

    Answer by Ctink8189 at 10:51 AM on May. 12, 2010

  • alot of SAHM's are very active in their community, volunteer work, and other non-paying jobs that make them happy. and if the husband makes enough money then why not take every moment to do something for yourself, whether its sitting around the house all day, or being an active SAHM. i wish i could. i used to say when i was little that i wanted to be a housewife when i grow up. lol. now i kinda cant wait to start working again and make some new friends and feel like some of that income is mine

    Answer by sstokes86 at 10:52 AM on May. 12, 2010

  • PS- when 2 of my 3 kids are high school age, they can probably stay at home more by themselves. But right now they are too little.

    My (currently) 6 yo will probably never be self-sufficient though. For me to work past school hours, she will need a respite caregiver. Day care/after school care will not be an option due to her special needs

    Answer by VeronicaLee at 10:52 AM on May. 12, 2010

  • I work my tail off at home while all 3 of our boys are at school. I refuse to pay for before and after school care because I have to be at a low paying job with no benefits. My Hubby is gone 4-6 weeks at a time for his job, and never really knows when he's going to be home. He wants me here when he does come home. I also want to be able to go up to school when they need me, or if the kids have Dr appts, etc. We can also afford for me to stay home, we live a very comfortable life.
    I can see your point if they are asking for money from others, but I also agree it's none of your business. Don't help them if they ask, do what you need to do and don't worry about them.

    Answer by MrsLeftlane at 10:54 AM on May. 12, 2010