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what is the point of "counting" (re: discipline)

If you're not going to follow through with a punishment? I admit, I do the count to 3, then it's a punishment. Usually I only get to 2, the kids know I mean business. My BIL on the other hand, always talks about being this huge disciplinarian. He'll make a big deal of counting to FOUR when the younger kids are misbehaving. Then he gets to 4 and....nothing! We're all kind of looking at him, waiting for the discipline we've heard so much about. My niece knows he's not going to do anything, she even laughs and says "five!" Then he gets upset with me when I step in if she is hitting her mom or sisters. I don't sugar coat it, but I'm not mean to her and she always listens to me. I don't want her to turn into a brat. Am I wrong for occasionally disciplining her if my sister and her husband don't?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 4:03 PM on May. 12, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (7)
  • I'm not a counter. You do something wrong you get punished. Better behave next time.
    BlooBird

    Answer by BlooBird at 4:05 PM on May. 12, 2010

  • Im not a counter either but we laugh at someone who says "ONE, TWO, STEEEVVVVEEE" --Steve is her husband and she wants him to come handle it...so funny!
    ria7

    Answer by ria7 at 4:08 PM on May. 12, 2010

  • actually i have counted to my son just because it seems to quiet him down, not to follow up any discipline. he's the type who doesnt calm down no matter what I do, so I give him a few minutes and once he settles down I hug him, quietly count so he has something to focus on and he's good to go!
    Owl_Feather

    Answer by Owl_Feather at 4:10 PM on May. 12, 2010

  • I count. It gives them time to understand that what they are doing is less than desired and gives them the opportunity to self correct. There are offenses that do not get counts such as hurting someone. but standing on the couch? Threatening to take a cookie? There are not halves or counting past 3 though. YOu hit three and you have obviously chosen to not comply and therefore need help understanding what the rules are in place for.
    But_Mommie

    Answer by But_Mommie at 4:15 PM on May. 12, 2010

  • I count for my littlest one... gives him a chance to change his behavior on his terms. I think it teaches them to make a choice. But, there is a punishment when I get to 3. Luckily, they know this and I don't have to get there any more. My older kids do not get this option any more. lol
    HistoryMamaX3

    Answer by HistoryMamaX3 at 4:21 PM on May. 12, 2010

  • I don't count. You do something wrong, you're getting punished. No need to prolong the inevitible.
    Bethsunshine

    Answer by Bethsunshine at 5:26 PM on May. 12, 2010

  • I still count, it still works, and my daughter is 14
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 8:38 PM on May. 12, 2010

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