Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Why do people say if a women works someone else is raising there child?

I dont get it. So since I drop my 4 year old off at headstart at 8am and my 4mnth old off at childcare at 8:10am and my hubby picks the kids up at 3:30pm and 3:45pm after he gets out of work. Than when I get home I cook, clean do homework ect we are not raising our children ourself? I dont get it..

So when your child enters 1st grade through high school and they are at school 8am to 3ish or later if they choose extra curricular but you drop them off and you pick them up your raising them? Or is someone else! I dont get the logic here! Because mine are baby to toddler I am not raising them but since yours are elementry and gone just as long you are! What is up with people on this board I dont get it...Everyone on here is a mother and everyone on here is doing what they have to do and equally raising there child!


Asked by NIKKIANDYBABY at 7:15 PM on May. 12, 2010 in Just for Fun

Level 7 (153 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (30)
  • I'm of the opinion that women who say that either have no idea of what really happens in a childcare provider/child/parent relationship or are so insecure in their own choices they have to belittle everyone else's parenting decisions to make their own seem "right".

    Yes, there are some parents who leave their kids at daycare for the maximum hours they can, whether they really need to or not, but the vast majority of parents who use daycare are just as caring and involved in their kids lives as any other parents. My oldest son went to an in-home daycare 8 years ago - we are still friends with his caregiver. Also we chose his daycare based on our values and what we felt she had to offer our child - not as a "holding tank" for our child for the day, and I'm sure most other parents do as well.

    In the end though I really don't care what people think of my choices. I know they are right for MY family, not anyone else's.

    Answer by canadianmom1974 at 7:56 PM on May. 12, 2010

  • Count the hours then get back with me. Your hours might be more but most of those the child is asleep so someone else is imposing their values on your child. Wait till she comes home and says "you're not the boss of me" bc she thinks the day care worker is her mom.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:17 PM on May. 12, 2010

  • Who cares what they think!?

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:19 PM on May. 12, 2010

  • I didn't want to miss all of the firsts, the bonding that takes place the first few yrs of their little lives. I wanted to be the one to experience all of it, not someone else. I feel very strong about being there for our boys all through their childhood. Yes they attend school, but I'm there too when they need me, or the teacher needs me. They are there to learn, not to walk for the first time, or say their first word etc. I taught all of ours the ABC's, 123's, etc. Not someone else. That's what I mean when I say I don't want a stranger raising our children. School isn't daycare. JMO..

    Answer by MrsLeftlane at 7:19 PM on May. 12, 2010

  • If you or your husband are not watching your kids, then someone else is and in a sense the daycare provider or teacher is raising them, even when they are in school.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:20 PM on May. 12, 2010

  • Cause they never worked??? I worked for the first 18 months of my kids life and I dont feel like someone else raised hmi. He is now 27 months old.

    Answer by armywife2009101 at 7:20 PM on May. 12, 2010

  • You don't get it because you aren't your kids' mom. You are their egg donor, incubator, chef, etc. You don't have enough quality time with them in the day to say you are the one doing the raising.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:20 PM on May. 12, 2010

  • Count the hours? My child is there from 8 to 3:30 just like school age children who have stay at home moms. So what is the difference how are you raising yours and mine are getting raised by someone else? My son is 4 and knows exactly who his mom is not teacher suzy just as your child should know the difference!!

    Answer by NIKKIANDYBABY at 7:21 PM on May. 12, 2010

  • :20 and how are you when your child gos to school? your child will be in school the same hours! So is the school raising your child?

    Answer by NIKKIANDYBABY at 7:21 PM on May. 12, 2010

  • :20 anon well I guess anyone with a child in school is not doing the raising either since they are there equal amount of hours

    Answer by NIKKIANDYBABY at 7:23 PM on May. 12, 2010