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when your babies were newborn and infants, did you ever feel like a babysitter rather than a mom? I have.. and still am, my son's an infant.. and I feel like I'm a babysitter ;[

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:22 AM on May. 13, 2010 in Babies (0-12 months)

Answers (9)
  • Uhhhh No. I never had and still don't. After all I was there when I pushed her out after hours of labor. Why would any one feel like a sitter and not a mother? It makes no sense!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:25 AM on May. 13, 2010

  • oh honey, this is completely normal. as long as you love your child, is totally ok to get aggravated, feel unappreciated,and feel like a babysitter at times. it could be post partum, or any number of things. just take a step back, and ask yourself- what is goin on when i feel this way--is there a certain time of day or night when i feel this way the most--is the baby doing the same thing when i feel this way. if you feel like this absolutley all the time, by all means please go to a doctor or therapist to get some medication, or try home remidies, anything to not feel like that 24/7. but every now and then, even for a few minutes each day, its completley normal, trust me, :)
    jeanniegirl82

    Answer by jeanniegirl82 at 1:26 AM on May. 13, 2010

  • Oh, I think I get you.

    And yes. Definitely.

    And sometimes I feel like a warden.

    Referee.

    Chauffeur.

    Maid.

    Cook.

    Soda jerk.

    Plumber.

    Psychologist.

    Editor.

    Archivist.

    Coach.

    Lots and lots and lots of things. And all fall under the main heading of MOM.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 1:28 AM on May. 13, 2010

  • I'd really love if you'd elaborate- because it's possible that if you are feeling a certain level of detachment then you are suffering from post-partum depression. I'm not sure exactly what you mean. You don't feel attached? Caring for your child never gives you the warm fuzzy feeling? You don't feel especially qualified? (as in- "wow all these big decisions to make I can't believe I am THE mom"). I never felt like the baby-sitter because all my baby-sitting experiences were so different from my motherhood. Babysitting to me meant playpens, crying, formula, smelly but perfumed diapers, burping, bottles, etc. My motherhood experience was like having an attachment to my body. I breastfed, did EC/cloth diapering, babywore, and always had my baby with me until past her first bday. So... it was and still is so different for me to watch someone else's child. My child was almost physically a part of me.
    Bellarose0212

    Answer by Bellarose0212 at 1:43 AM on May. 13, 2010

  • I only felt like the sitter when I worked over 40 hours a week and went to pick my kids up from their crappy babysitter,,,,you are the real deal momma,,,
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:46 AM on May. 13, 2010

  • gdiamante I just love your post! SO TRUE, SO TRUE!
    MJ_BN_FE

    Answer by MJ_BN_FE at 2:24 AM on May. 13, 2010

  • Yes i did. For the first month i didnt really feel like he was mine. I took great care of him, it just didnt seem like i was as attatched as i should be...When he hit a month old it kicked in one day...I asked the doc about it at his 2 week appointment and she said its normal as long as it doesnt last too long...She said its more common in c sections (which i had)...
    carsonsmommytam

    Answer by carsonsmommytam at 12:02 PM on May. 13, 2010

  • They're blobs for months! It's really common to feel like a sitter. I was a nanny of an infant from birth to 9 months, and I didn't feel a connection until I was able to witness that he had cognition! When you see your baby's first social smile, it's magical. :)
    SMH2010

    Answer by SMH2010 at 12:39 PM on May. 13, 2010

  • I kept waiting for my son's real parents to come pick him up.
    It didn't feel real to me for a long time. Even now, he's 21 months old, and I look at him, and I can't believe he's my son, even though he's totally ingrained on my daily routine.
    I also battled with PPD and we had a really hard time getting BFing going (eventually we figured it out). My mental state just wasn't there, and I felt like someone else could do this better than I could.
    I agree that the first social smile is magical. Nothing will warm your heart more (except maybe the word "Mama").
    musicpisces

    Answer by musicpisces at 3:23 AM on May. 16, 2010

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