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sexually fustrated (a little graphic)

My husband is one of the few people who has waited until marriage to have sex.I have a bit more experience then he does. Been married for 2 years.When we do have sex, he gets off, I end up having to get myself off. I have tryed to get him to finish me off but he wont touch my kitty. Doing myself is alright but it makes him feel bad becuase he didnt get me off. Plus it is not the same as an orgaism. The only forplay we have is he plays w/ my boobs and that is it. I use to like it but it is getting to the point that it doesnt turn me on anymore. I try to talk to him about it but it doesnt go over well, he either turns red and clams up or he starts in on how he cant do anything right how he is going to stop having sex altogther. I am getting to the point where I dread having sex, I just do it to make him happy. Do you ladies have any ideas on how to get my green husband out of his shell and last longer so I can enjoy sex agian?


Asked by Anonymous at 1:24 PM on May. 13, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • Give him a bj early in the day then later try having sex see if he last longer then let him know hey try not to bust a nut wait for me. If he can't hold back turn yourself on I mean get yourself worked so when your ready you jump on him and ride him good until you get yours or cum together (I love those cum together ones) Sorry too much info but that is what I would do and have tried... Hehehe GL

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:32 PM on May. 13, 2010

  • Maybe he is gay? Watch porn with him. Tell him what you want when he watches it.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:27 PM on May. 13, 2010

  • Bless his heart. His mom probably taught him that sex was dirty. That's a shame bc experience is great. My first husband and I were both virgins. Even then I knew he wasn't doing something right since I had masturbated since childhood and knew what was supposed to happen in the end somehow. Does he drink? Maybe you can get him loosened up and you get aggressive with him. Make him your boy toy and tell him what you want him to do. I dated a guy who wouldn't perform oral sex but he loved beer. So I took his last beer and poured it over kitty and funny how he lapped that beer up! lol He needs to relax and know that sex is fun. Tell him you want some fun, sexual playtime. If he's not sure what to do then help him out. I used to tell my x if he didn't I'd find someone who would! That got his attention!

    Answer by admckenzie at 1:29 PM on May. 13, 2010

  • porn might make him get off faster. i'd ask him to masturbate first before sex.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:31 PM on May. 13, 2010

  • Yikes.. I don't know what to say in this situation. I was going to bring up the fact that maybe he feels lame and inexperienced but he should feel comfortable enough with you to be able to discuss your sex life and try new things. I don't know why he married you if he doesn't feel that way. That has to be hard. I know it may be weird to some people but I agree with Anon :27.. maybe try watching some porn together? Doesn't even have to be hardcore porn, try soft porn since he seems to be a little insecure about himself sexually.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:31 PM on May. 13, 2010

  • If he wont touch your "kitty"(cute btw) then don't touch him either.
    New to the game or not, he can't be so selfish in bed.

    The next time he says he can't do anything right, tell him you'll teach him. Get him to watch you finish yourself off. Take his hand in yours and do the movements you need but with his hand.
    If he says he doesn't want to touch you then you need to let him know exactly how that makes you feel.

    Maybe find out what his biggest fantasies are and offer to play them out if he puts forth more effort.

    I don't know. Hopefully something works for you soon.

    Answer by Laila-May at 1:33 PM on May. 13, 2010

  • Poor guy, and this is why we should wait to do after marriage?, he seems to have issues that maybe some counseling might help.

    Answer by older at 1:51 PM on May. 13, 2010

  • He is defently not gay, I have no problem turning him on and he was not brought up that sex was dirty, he was just brought up to save himself until marriage. His dad has tried to talk to him about the birds and the bees when he was a teenager but he didnt wouldnt talk to him about it. He is really that green about sex. He loves it but a little unconfertable about talking about it.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:08 PM on May. 13, 2010