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help im confused? why cant he make up his mind?

so i been friends with this guy for about 8 months and i was really into him and it seemed he was into me so i brought up the possibility of going steady, he got upset and said he doesnt want a relationship just friendship. at first i was hurt but then realized that having him as a friend is just as good as anything. he brings up women he is interested in and i tell him go for it if you want her..then"she" is never brought up again at least by him...ok so the problem is, this guy that i really liked in college came back into my life, and admitted he still has feelings for me, so i brought it up to this guy friend hoping he could help me sort thu it like i do with him..well the friend says forget about him it wont work..then said fine whatever do what u want. i asked why he was being like this he said you know why. then he apologized for being possessive and jealous and he was upset that he wasnt the other guy. that he wnts me

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:38 AM on May. 14, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (4)
  • Yes, he is being selfish and probably likes the attention he gets from you when you two hang out, but doesn't want to share you with someone else. I think you need to go for it with the other guy and see what happnes. It doesn't sound like you have anything to lose with your current friend, you two can still be friends. If you're not "going steady" then you have no reason not to have a date with the other guy, right? It isn't fair for him to be possessive of you if he has give you no committment and has no plans to do so.
    MaryMW

    Answer by MaryMW at 12:12 PM on May. 14, 2010

  • he wants to string you along. I have had very good guy friends that I cared for deeply, but I didn't want a relationship. I still wanted them around me "just in case" because I had established a trust with them. You are his security blanket. He isn't trying to hurt you, but he's being selfish. He feel that your relationship will change, yet he wont give you a relationship. I'd stay friends with him, but I'd cut the hang out time down a little bit and look for a steady bf. Try out the college guy! You can't be on your friend's shelf forever.
    LisaG777

    Answer by LisaG777 at 11:43 AM on May. 14, 2010

  • i would tell him you know you said you didnt want a relationship and i do and this other guy does and give him a option to be with you or your moving on you cant wait your life away!
    saadamarie

    Answer by saadamarie at 11:44 AM on May. 14, 2010

  • sounds to me like hes just playing dumb little high school games. I would just talk to him and see if he wants the same thing as you do? and if not then get over him and just be his friend and try out the college guy.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:09 PM on May. 14, 2010

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