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when someone dies...

when someone dies, im not the person to say that im sorry for their loss. i dont do this because all i can think is that they've heard it a million times from everyone else. instead i hug and say i love them. i know if it were me id be ready to snap after a few hundred times of hearing it even tho everyone means well. is it disrespectful of me not to say this?

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sstokes86

Asked by sstokes86 at 1:19 PM on May. 14, 2010 in Relationships

Level 4 (41 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • Nope, I feel the same way.
    Jademom07

    Answer by Jademom07 at 1:19 PM on May. 14, 2010

  • Not at all. Being disrespectful would be saying "No big deal, everyone dies sometime."

    My friend's mom passed away last week and I felt so bad for him at the wake because everyone kept asking "How are you doing?"
    How do you think he's doing??? His mom just died!!!
    He knew they had good intentions but was so tired of the question and so tired of saying "As good as can be expected."

    It's always difficult to know what to say in these situations.
    I just hugged him and told him I loved him.
    Laila-May

    Answer by Laila-May at 1:22 PM on May. 14, 2010

  • The worst is telling someone they're in a better place. Or that it was just their time to go. Or that you'll find plenty of other fish in the sea - said to me 2 weeks to the day of my DH's passing at 30 years of age, and I was 25.

    I've been told the first 2 repeatedly and wanted to smack them every time. Being told someone was sorry never bothered me. I was sorry for my loss as well.
    Ginger0104

    Answer by Ginger0104 at 1:24 PM on May. 14, 2010

  • I agree, I think them just being reminded that you love them, shows you care just as much as everyone saying "I'm sorry for your loss." I was the same way when I lost my baby...I got tired of hearing it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:36 PM on May. 14, 2010

  • I just give my condolences. Most are hurting so badly and/or in shock they can't hear us anyway.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 3:54 PM on May. 14, 2010

  • Nope, I think your response is just fine. I still say I'm sorry for their loss, but I feel like you that they have heard it a million times. Instead of reminding them they have just lost a loved one, hearing that you love them is probably more comforting.
    TarLion

    Answer by TarLion at 4:45 PM on May. 14, 2010

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