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I babysit a 3 1/2 yr old boy that is an only child and a bit on the "spoiled side...advice needed here please...

He's been in my care for 7 months. He is 3 1/2. HE is a very intelligent little boy.Knows all his shapes,colors,numbers,is potty trained (finally..YES!,lol)
My problem is this.
He is VERY dependant on everyone doing everything FOR him. I noticed his father is that way too. Seems to be a very spoiled man...and it seems to me its like father, like son.
Do you think I'm being mean when I make him do things for himself?
Here are some examples:

*He never takes his shoes off or puts them on by himself (they are velcro tennies)..every a.m. momma sits him down and takes them off.Every p.m. grandma sits him down and puts them on. Now with me...I make him put them on before we go outside.At one point he cried and threw such a fit, but I let him sit in the mudroom and told him he couldn't come outside until he put his shoes on by himself.Guess what? It took 15 mins, but he did it. Now he does it no problem until parents (cont)


Asked by Anonymous at 1:26 PM on May. 14, 2010 in Preschoolers (3-4)

This question is closed.
Answers (5)
  • I used to babysit a couple of really spoiled kids. They just had to get used to the way I did things. If Mum and Dad wanted to run around in circles after them, that was their business. But I made it clear I was playing that, and if that was unacceptable then they'd have to get another sitter.

    Answer by CynergyDiva at 9:07 PM on May. 14, 2010

  • are around, once they are here...he throws a fit,kicks,screams,cries and won't do it himself and they baby him and do it for him.
    * He won't pull down his clothes to use the bathroom or put them back on. Now, in my at least attempt to put thier own clothes on and attempt to pull them down to use the potty..especially at this age. He will pee his pants before he pulls them down to go pee. He will sit in the bathroom butt naked for 10 minutes before he even TRIES to put his underwear and pants back on.(he takes them completley off to use the toilet). Now, I tell him..I will help you but I won't do it for you..and you need to at least try. Parents come...they baby him about it.
    *eating...good Lord...if its not a fried tator tot he will not even put it to his lips! Thats actaully a battle I just threw my hands up about because at hime they don't make him try ANYTHING.
    THESE are just a couple examples.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:31 PM on May. 14, 2010

  • I would discuss your concerns with them. This will only become more frustrating if you don't. You both have to be on the same page in how this is handled. Maybe he has them so wrapped that they are convinced that he can't do these things so they don't make him try?

    Answer by Jademom07 at 1:33 PM on May. 14, 2010

  • sounds like the child i watch he is 3 and they carry him everywhere they will not put him down when they get here they make me take him from them and he always comes with his hands in his pants he KNOW he is not allowed to keep his hands in his pants at my house but time his parents come he puts his hands in his pants if the other kids are playing with a toy he grabs it from them and my child cries and his mom goes oh he just wants to play with it for a min he will give it back when we leave OMG she lets him hit the 18 month old and don't do anything to him when he was like 2 he use to slap the parents in the face like 10 times in a row and my mom finally said "you shouldn't let him act like that" and the parents go oh he is only playing its okay.....he is such a BRAT when they come

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:05 PM on May. 14, 2010

  • Um. Are you a care provider with early childhood training, one who cares for several children other than this one , or are you his babysitter? Some kids have trouble with pottytraining well after 3 and even accidents after 4. It's frustrating, but kind of a fact that needs to be accepted. Many 3 and 4 year olds need help with shoes or clothes. This does not mean they are lazy or spoiled. They are still babies in many ways. In his family, love is shown by this level of care. When he does not recieve that from you, in his view he is not being cared for. This is not spoiled. You are ,albeit unintentionally, denying his need to feel cared for. You could instead make a game of it or use reward charts. If he has a friend he likes to emulate who is more independant this could help. I expect his family believes he will grow independant in his own time. Which he will.

    Answer by northernprairie at 3:04 AM on May. 21, 2010