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How should I feel???

Me and my husband was going back and forth about something stupid... Nothing serious. He mumbled a slick comment upstairs and I told him that I heard him mumble something and he don't have the balls to disrespect me out loud... We have been together almost 4 years... I have always said the same slick comments and he knows that I don't take shit from anyone... Never have! So I guess to chalenge me he starts saying slick comments out loud... Like he works, I don't... Stupid shit! So as I was defending myself and going off... He told me to SHUT THE FUCK UP... several times! He has never talked to me like that.... He has always been so sweet to me, never raised his voice to me or disrespect me. I just came down stairs and when he finally came down he asked me a dumb ? and I would not answer him.I told him I wanted to be left alone and statrted ignoring him... He got mad and told me I could buy a ticket back to miami...

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:20 PM on May. 14, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (13)
  • I'd buy the ticket. You will find out quick enough whats up. I doubt he really expects you to do it. There is obviously something wrong on his end if he has changed. Is he at threat of losing his job or are you having more money problems? He sounds stressed and is taking it out on you. Of course he could be seeing someone else or just not satisfied in the marriage. I hope it isn't that but you need to talk to him and if it keeps up you should think about buying that ticket and taking a cool off period. You will find out what his problem is if you leave. I promise you that.
    itsmesteph11

    Answer by itsmesteph11 at 6:35 PM on May. 14, 2010

  • "I have always said the same slick comments and he knows that I don't take shit from anyone... "

    Maybe he told you to STFU because he is tired of the way you talk to him.. Maybe he grew some balls and decided to stand up for himself.. Why should he be sweet to you all the time when you make mean comments to him? Why should he take shit from you when you refuse to take it from him?
    Ren_Ren

    Answer by Ren_Ren at 6:23 PM on May. 14, 2010

  • I think you should take some time to cool off then talk to him about it, it sounds like it was just him being defensive since you were in an argument if thats not normal behavior from him .
    countrygirl06

    Answer by countrygirl06 at 6:30 PM on May. 14, 2010

  • I agree with Ren_Ren
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 6:31 PM on May. 14, 2010

  • I won't try to tell you how you should feel or how you should talk to each other. In our house, though, we have a rule. Even though we seem to speak to each other disrespectfully under normal circumstances, we NEVER speak disrespectfully in anger - neither one of us. It's just an unwritten rule that we developed early on, and it's our golden rule. It works well for us...just a suggestion.

    Joking around is one thing, but I refuse to be spoken to disrespectfully when we're angry. How can I ask him to speak to me respectfully when I won't extend the same courtesy to him?
    bluejupalex

    Answer by bluejupalex at 6:31 PM on May. 14, 2010

  • I NEVER disrespect my husband or talk down to him.... I just say slick comments (jokes).... And about me not taking shit meaning he knows I don't take any disrespecting me! I am not one of those women that get verbally abused or talked down to!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:38 PM on May. 14, 2010

  • You gave the impression that he made a slick comment in a way that showed you disrespect, then added that you make slick comments all the time.. You did not specify that you make slick comments in a joking sort of way.. You gave the impression that the slick comment he made were the same as the ones you make to him all the time..
    Ren_Ren

    Answer by Ren_Ren at 6:43 PM on May. 14, 2010

  • I am upset so it is hard to write out every detail and you can only write so much in these post... My husband has recently joined the Navy about 8 months ago and I just moved all the way up here to be with him about 2 months ago because he finally got stationed here. He has changed ALOT! And I hate it!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:49 PM on May. 14, 2010

  • You have to take the majority of the blame on this one. You could have dealt with the issue at hand and then walked away but YOU had to up the anti. You egged him on and ya got what ya got. You both were acting VERY childish. 


    If you were an adult you would sit with him and discuss first the childish behavior on your part and apologizefor it.  Im sure if he sees the sincerity he too will apologize for his childish behavior.  THEN you can work on what ever the actual issue at hand is.


    If after 4 yrs you have not figured out how to act like married adults and not silly kids you will be in for a rough go at this marriage thing.  Learn to deal with the problems in a healthy way and I guarantee you life will be much easier in all areas.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:53 PM on May. 14, 2010

  • You guys are not getting it.... An arguement is that an ARGUEMENT!!!!! My husband just told me to buy a plane ticket back to Miami!!!!!!! itsmesteph11 is the only one that seems to get it! How should I feel about that??????
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:05 PM on May. 14, 2010

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