Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

How the heck do I get over this????

My SO has a "friend" that he has known longer then we have been together. He does have other female friends that I never had a problem with. There was just this one female that gave me bad vibes. Eventually I found out that she had screwed over my MOM in the past Long story short, she slept with my mom's boyfriend. When I found this out, I asked SO if he had slept with her in the past. He admitted he did. I told him I didn't want him to have any contact with her (whiny maybe but I was pissed and can't remember half the stuff that came out of my mouth when I found all this out!)He refused saying they were just friends now and we kinda of let it go. Thing is, she is this successful college graduate with a high flying blossoming career in the movie industry and I admit, I am jealous. I work at a job I am not very happy with, struggling paycheck to paycheck. In the back of my mind I am always wondering if he regrets (cont)

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 2:18 AM on May. 15, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (14)
  • settling for me. I want to let this go but every time I think I have, I see her pictures on the internet holding the emmy award a show she worked on won, or on the set of a new movie, or at another graduation, receiving another degree!!! I want to better my life but with 3 kids to support, chasing my dream of being an artist seems foolish right now. My self esteem is taking a dive!! How do I let this go???

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:20 AM on May. 15, 2010

  • you dont get over it. theres a woman that is friends with my husbands brother and my husband slept with her years ago. now everytime theres a family get together shes there and i cant stop picturing them together. i even had to watch them dance at his brothers wedding since she was maid of honor and my husband was best man. i dont think ill ever get over it

    Answer by sstokes86 at 2:22 AM on May. 15, 2010

  • she sounds too like shes all business. you have something she doesnt have. your DH and your beautiful kids! shell never get that

    Answer by sstokes86 at 2:23 AM on May. 15, 2010

  • WOW! you need trust... no trust, no relationship! but it seems like this is more of a deeper issue of self worth... quit comparing yourself to her... you have 3 beautiful kids (I doubt she does) and a award for a show does make you succesful. Being happy with yor life DOES! sure you might not be able to go back to school full time but look into a few classes... my cuz went to a tech school while still working full time to become an ultra sound tech.. it took her 16 months and she is now starting off at 35 an hour and she is happy as can be.. thats all that matters....

    Answer by FITmama2B at 2:26 AM on May. 15, 2010

  • doesnt*

    Answer by FITmama2B at 2:26 AM on May. 15, 2010

  • oh hunny I know how you feel I use to be sooo envious of my cousin but then i stopped and thought to myself why? I have thing way better then alot of people. I may struggle paycheck to paycheck but I have a great family, loving kids and a wonderful man. Your life has nothing to do with hers and the grass always look greener on the other side but most of the time the greener side has just as many problems as you. and never feel like your man is "settling" you are wonderful and if he can't see that then someone else will. if you think " I am the best" you will start to believe it

    Answer by symle456 at 2:28 AM on May. 15, 2010

  • When you get married you should not have "close" friends that are the other sex. Especialy if you have slept with them that would be a really big issue with me and i would not allow it. He should have respect for you and you should be more important than the other girl. I mean how do you know if he has been with her sense you have been with him.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:28 AM on May. 15, 2010

  • I don't care how "successful" she is career-wise, she is trashy. Do not trust her with your SO.

    If he loves you, he will respect your feelings and keep his distance from her.

    Just stand your ground and demand respect for yourself.

    Remember, "past behavior is a good indication of present and future behavior".

    Good Luck to you.

    Good luck.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:32 AM on May. 15, 2010

  • THANK YOU LADIES!! I swear I am crying as I read your responses! I want to believe I am better then her and I think eventually it will happen....

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:44 AM on May. 15, 2010

  • Point is, he is with you now isn't he? You have something she doesn't.. Be happy with that..

    Answer by Ren_Ren at 8:21 AM on May. 15, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.