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Why do alot of moms on here think that having a baby young is the end of the world?

They seem to think that if you have a baby young or out of wedlock... that your life is over. I had my first at 15 and out of wedlock. but I got an education and was able to do that even though I had a child to care for. Now my Education does me no good because my kidneys failed. If you think about it... having a child young was good for me... cuz if I didn't I would have never been able to have babies. Can someone explain to me WHY some mothers think that way? Input from moms who do is apperciated.

 
soonmommyof3

Asked by soonmommyof3 at 4:27 AM on May. 17, 2010 in Religion & Beliefs

Level 11 (634 Credits)
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Answers (30)
  • This upsets me....I am a hard working young mother who doesn't disrespect older mothers even though they know having a kid at a certain age is very risky.....I am just on this site for advice and i love it.But i hate it when these moms go on here complaining about YM's. I am proud to support my son.....I guess we are all just horrible sluts who don't work and live of PA from what i hear...Fuck that....sum ppl r so ignorant.
    lendales_mommi

    Answer by lendales_mommi at 4:39 AM on May. 17, 2010

  • I don't understand it either. Yeah it means you have to grow up a lot faster. But if you are willing to work for it, it can be the BEST thing that ever happened to you. I had my first when I was 19 (but I was pregnant and had a miscarriage at 18). I got married young at 18, had him when I was 19, had my next one at 20, and then waited 5 years to have my DD. I LOVE being a young mom. I think that if you are a young mom and you really try, you can make it and be quite happy.
    AprilDJC

    Answer by AprilDJC at 4:59 AM on May. 17, 2010

  • Thank you both ladies for your input. I agree!
    soonmommyof3

    Answer by soonmommyof3 at 5:04 AM on May. 17, 2010

  • it CAN turn out to be not so good. but thats not always the case. i dont think young people should plan to get pregnant i think its a good idea to finish school make sure you ahve stable income youre married etc. BUT it isnt always the end of the world either. I had my daughter 15 months ago. im 21, got pregnant was i was 19 out of wedlock. im with the dad still weve been together for 4 years plan on getting married, have our own place.... i cant stand when people assume we are automatically shitty parents just because were young, or we arent smart.
    MomNbabyGirl009

    Answer by MomNbabyGirl009 at 5:27 AM on May. 17, 2010

  • Honestly I've known some teen moms who do a hellofa better job then one that is much older. It's just society has made it taboo.
    luvmygrlz

    Answer by luvmygrlz at 6:36 AM on May. 17, 2010

  • I'm glad it had worked out for you, but it's not that way for a lot of young mothers. I don't judge when I see a young mother because I don't know the circumstances. I have to say though, even though you were able to continue your education many young mothers struggle with this, you probably had a very good support system to help care for your child while you were going to school.

    RyansMom001

    Answer by RyansMom001 at 6:42 AM on May. 17, 2010

  • Rather than anecdotes, look at the facts. Children of teen parents are more likely to live in poverty and are less likely to attend college
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 7:00 AM on May. 17, 2010

  • Facts or not, they do not apply to EVERY woman who has had a child young. Truth be told, women we're having babies at 13, 14. That was the age. By 25 you were thought to be "unfit"... why no children, why no husband? Whats wrong with you? Some your ladies have babies young and YES they fit the sterotype to the letter, however some of them know that in order to provide for thier chil(ren), school and a better education are more then necessary. My grandparents on my dads side were very poor. Uneducated. Where is my dad? He is a General Surgeon in the Downtown Medical District of Houston, with is hown practice. My mom had me a 17... did I go to college? I am currently in school to be an RN. Anecdotes are not, you cannot ignore the FACT that not all young moms and thier chil(ren) turn out for the worse.
    4xsthetrouble

    Answer by 4xsthetrouble at 7:08 AM on May. 17, 2010

  • I had my first at the age of 16. I really think she was the best thing that happened to me. before i got pregnant with her I was headed down a very bad road of drugs and partying. since getting pregnant with her it all stopped and i've never looked back.

    about education, i never wanted to be anything but a housemaker. so the education was not important to me. people may think i'm making a mistake, but home is where i feel i should be and where i want to be.

    I love taking care of my family. me and dh decided together that I will just stay home and care for the house. when i worked we was not doing to good. now with me home our marriage has gotten much better.
    oldfashionSAHM

    Answer by oldfashionSAHM at 7:23 AM on May. 17, 2010

  • OP here, I would like to add that all four of my kids have the same father. We will celebrate our 10th Anniversary on the 26th of this month. We also have our own van paid off. No house yet! I was not ready for one and still am not... but hubby wants one, so we have a two year plan.

    soonmommyof3

    Answer by soonmommyof3 at 7:23 AM on May. 17, 2010

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