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Raising kids in an interfaith house?

OK, I just recently converted from Christianity to Paganism. I am telling DH tonight. I'm not sure how he will react. He knows I believe differently but he doesn't know how. I really want to tell him because this is such an intimate part of me, and honestly if I can't tell him this and him except me...then what kind of relationship will we have? The only true problem I see is the kids. We have been raising them as Christians. I have a two year old and a 3 month old. I want to raise them no differently and have them know Daddy is a Christian and Mommy is Pagan...and let them choose for themselves what they want to be...but how do I break the news to DH and explain all this to him?

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Asked by Anonymous at 12:16 PM on May. 18, 2010 in Religion & Beliefs

Answers (11)
  • Well, the first thing I would do is focus on explaining your beliefs to him. The majority of his concerns will be about the misconceptions he no doubt has about Paganism. So your first goal should be to explain to him your beliefs and why you believe this way. I would also suggest that you purchase an "intro to Paganism" style book for him, so that he can start to discover your new found beliefs and understand them more indepth. As for the kids, we are not raising our children in religion. My DH is Christian and I am Pagan. What we are doing however is giving them a background by teaching them the stories and myths that come with each of our belief systems as well as others. I have a number of Greek & Roman children's myth books as well as a My Book Of Bible Stories for them. This way they will have a background for whatever path they choose.

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 12:21 PM on May. 18, 2010

  • The same way you did here. Sit him down and let him know your reasons for converting, why you think it is best for you, and your plan of letting the children follow the path they would like !! GL momma !!

    Answer by mommymandaleigh at 12:21 PM on May. 18, 2010

  • Pick your moment.  You want to pick a time when he is relaxed, you won't be interrupted and you have his undivided attention.  GL!


    Answer by beeky at 12:23 PM on May. 18, 2010

  • How do you convert to an entirely different religion without your husband being aware of it while it's happening?

    Answer by Kimposible at 12:24 PM on May. 18, 2010

  • If your husband is okay with it, I would also suggest you look in to finding a local UU church. They do a very good job at blending Christianity and Paganism, and they may have a children's group.

    And there may be other local interfaith families for you as well... Check out local UU or Pagan groups or even check Meet Up for "Interfaith" groups....

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 12:25 PM on May. 18, 2010

  • Kimposible: He knows that I converted....just not to what. He has seen some of the things I have been doing. For instance I went into our local metaphysical store with him around. He very well may already know and I just have no clue....

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:27 PM on May. 18, 2010

  • Just tell him...

     It wont be an issue b/c he already loves and accepts you for who you are. Your kids are still babies and I personally think that it is great you are opening them up to new ideas. Its kinda ironic, I always think of Paganism as a natural, feminine (yet balanced)version of Christianity. I think you'll be surprised how intriguing your new faith will be to your hubby.


    Answer by sugahmamma at 12:34 PM on May. 18, 2010

  • My DH is very Christian and I am very Pagan. It has only resantly that our different belifes have caused issues with us. We have a 3yr and a 1yr. DH sugested I find a group of pagans to hang out with, I did (I love Meet up) they are very kid friendly so I asked if I could take our kids with me. He wont tell me no, but I can tell it hurts him. Bright side is that he already knew more fact and less myth about paganism as a whole before we even got married. I think out side of thinking that my belifes are wrong, he is afraid that one or both of our girls is going to fallow in my path. We have made an agreement that the kids will learn about both (and any other they want to) religion, and do our best not to push one over the other...there are days that I wish he was pagan, and I know that there are days he wishes I was pagan. As my husband would say if he is a "true" christian he will accept your new found faith.

    Answer by Raine2007 at 1:10 PM on May. 18, 2010

  • What took you so long? If I was your spouse, I would be devastated that you waited to tell me something so important to you.

    Answer by rkoloms at 4:29 PM on May. 18, 2010

  • I am Pagan and my dh is Christian. We are raising our grandson whom now is 9 and what we have decided is that I will teach religion, not just mine, but all. It is not bc I know more, but bc of how easy I make it and that some of his Christian classmates have scared him with their preaching.
    Telling my dh was not easy, so the first thing you need to do is focus on you and he and coming to terms with the different beliefs between you two. Then since your children are still very young, simply share many different beliefs with them and let them make the decision for themselves when the time comes.
    But the first thing you DO need to do is to make sure that you and your husband are on the same page with the differences in beliefs and show him, let him read information, etc...
    It is NOT like you do NOT believe, it is that YOU believe differently.

    Answer by gmasboy at 5:38 PM on May. 18, 2010

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