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How do I deal with my boyfriend's female battle buddies?

My bf and I have been together 3 years but 1.5 year long distance. We've been good but I have a hard time dealing with this whole Army thing. Before he joined the army he moved to LA and didn't have friends. Since he joined the army he made plenty of friends but not in LA except two females which are battle buddies.

I'm alittle worried because he's so close to them. They're his only good friends and they have a close bond, he gets deployed with them in 2012, he goes to drill with them, he goes to airborne school with them soon AND language school! How do I compete with that when I'm over 2,000 miles away? I met one of the girls, she is nice and engaged but I still can't get rid of my jealousy because she gets to spend time with him and I can't! Her bf is a soldier too and deploying soon, and he seems okay with their friendship.

I'm just really jealous, I'm not used to my bf having a close bond with another woman.

Answer Question
 
chelle21689

Asked by chelle21689 at 2:09 PM on May. 21, 2010 in Relationships

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • Its understandable to be a little jealous, people form strong bonds in thearmy. I still talk to people I went to basic with. If he has never given you a reason not to trust him then you shouldnt worry to much.
    okmommy08

    Answer by okmommy08 at 2:13 PM on May. 21, 2010

  • Why are you not married and with him where he is at? If he is in part of the army that has males and females, you will just have to get use to him being around female. My DH was Feild Artillary(males only) so I did not have that problem.
    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 2:17 PM on May. 21, 2010

  • at least he's just a bf... dh cheated on me with his battle buddies.......
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:17 PM on May. 21, 2010

  • The worst thing you could do is be overly jealous, it could push him more towards one of them. It's a hard position he's in, being a soldier, a very admirable position as well. Be sure to keep that in mind if you don't already and remind him how supportive you are of what he's doing. It's okay to let him know you're a little insecure about him having only female friends. He'll make some guy friends soon enough.

    The fact that he hasn't hid them from you says a lot. It's a very good thing.

    The most you can do is keep working on you, remind yourself daily how beautiful you are, and how much you have going for yourself. Keep the trust up.

    Good luck <3
    Skepticchick

    Answer by Skepticchick at 2:24 PM on May. 21, 2010

  • He tries to assure me that there is no feelings or attraction. It's hard to believe because they get along great and she is kind of attractive. He says he sees her as one of the guys but how can I know for sure? I don't know...I met her and she was cool but I'm still scared to trust her. Anyways, I hate that question lol. Why aren't we married...does it matter? We been together for a few years but I'm still young..I'm 21 and he's 22. We're not ready to get married, he's not financially stable and he's still helping his mom with rent. I'm not financially stable and I'm still in school but we plan to be together ASAP when I'm able to move.
    chelle21689

    Answer by chelle21689 at 2:30 PM on May. 21, 2010

  • Anonymous, how did u find out?
    chelle21689

    Answer by chelle21689 at 2:31 PM on May. 21, 2010

  • Oh yeah, he is in Army Reserve if that counts for anything. He still lives with his mom and brother helping them pay rent and bills because they are struggling.
    chelle21689

    Answer by chelle21689 at 2:39 PM on May. 21, 2010

  • So he is not active duty? Just in the part time army? You are still going to have to learn how to deal with them.
    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 3:18 PM on May. 21, 2010

  • I know that, that is why I'm asking for advice.
    chelle21689

    Answer by chelle21689 at 3:37 PM on May. 21, 2010

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