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Is it fair to move away?

My husband and I have been together 6 years. We have 2 children and he has one daughter. Is it fair to move 2 hour away to move to a better school district for my kids and cheaper living even though well be moving away from his daughter?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:42 PM on May. 21, 2010 in Just for Fun

Answers (11)
  • No, it's not fair if he has a good working relationship with both his daughter and her mother. Otherwise I suppose things are tense as is and moving is not going to cause more problems.
    MamaRoberts

    Answer by MamaRoberts at 6:50 PM on May. 21, 2010

  • Anon here!

    Well he can still see her on breaks summer and stuff!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:51 PM on May. 21, 2010

  • How old is your husband's daughter? How often do they see each other now? Does he have regular visitation? I think it is important to consider EVERYONE involved. If it will upset everyone and create more stress, and your husband being away from your children together (driving back and forth to see his daughter if she's young), then I think you have to weigh the pros and cons carefully.

    You need to provide for your family. If moving a hundred or so miles away makes that more feasible, then you should do it. 100 miles is still very "do able" in terms of maintaining relationships--but it will take more effort to be successful.
    LoriKeet

    Answer by LoriKeet at 6:52 PM on May. 21, 2010

  • I would say no, just because you married him knowing that he had another child... while it would benefit your kids, it would hurt his other dd. I am saying this from experience because my ss's mom move 2 1/2 hrs away from us and every other weekend we have to drive 1 hr and 15 mins to pick them up and then drop them off- it gets really expensive. Also, they cant come over and have supper or watch a movie or play with their bros and sis- simple things like that... and in order to go to their school functions we have to make the trip of 2 1/2 hrs each way and it really is just an inconvience- especially when my ss's don't like the drive and would rather stay home.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:52 PM on May. 21, 2010

  • no
    nakita72

    Answer by nakita72 at 6:55 PM on May. 21, 2010

  • Why isnt it fair? He can see her holidays, breaks, and summer?

    This is op!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:00 PM on May. 21, 2010

  • I think it's fine. He can still see her on weekends, breaks, and summer. Two hours away is nothing. The closest family to us live nine hours away.
    Christina807

    Answer by Christina807 at 7:11 PM on May. 21, 2010

  • it's only two hours - that drive will seem like nothing after a few times. do what you need to do for the rest of your family and don't worry. unless she is used to popping over after school unexpectedly, it shouldn't be a big change...
    figaro8895

    Answer by figaro8895 at 7:19 PM on May. 21, 2010

  • Offer to pay for the bus/train fare it would take for her to visit her dad just as often as she did before the move. It's not fair that she has to have limited contact with her dad because YOU want to put your kids in a better school district. Your kids won't perish in the school district they are in.

    If I was his daughter, I'd be royally pissed and wouldn't like you very much.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:47 PM on May. 21, 2010

  • You do what you have to do. Your dh has a new family and that family is the one he needs to take care of. I'm sure he pays child support and helps out with his daughter as he can. Of course if he doesn't want to move then you really cant make him. His EX and he will just have to make arrangements for his daughter to get her time with him if you move.
    itsmesteph11

    Answer by itsmesteph11 at 8:32 PM on May. 21, 2010

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