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get out while i can...... be a little girl forever living under mother dearest's rules or being an independent woman on my own providing for my son and I.

im 22 years old and 9 months pregnant with my first child. my mom came out of nowhere today lecturing me and fussing. telling me the father of my child isnt allowed on her property and if he comes she is going to call the police. she strongly dislikes him and does not want me or my baby to have anything to do with him. and the thing is i never had the intention of inviting over to my mom's house because i know how she feels about him. he was on the other line while she was telling me this she said that is why she was doing it. she acted very childish and crazy we were just on the phone having a casual conversation. i think after i have the baby the best solution for me is to find a little low income apartment for me and the baby and be an independent woman on my own. because i see that mom wants and will use the baby as a way of an ultimatum. she doesnt even want him to come to the hospital when i have the baby.


Asked by Anonymous at 7:17 PM on May. 21, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (12)
  • hell yeah get out! what does the future hold for you and your child if you stay? whether or not she likes baby daddy, it is YOUR choice and it's pretty sick of her to not want him involved with his own child unless he is abusive. it's not up to her who's around. i lived like a pauper for years and i was fine... my daughter was fine. sanity is way more important than money - as long as you can pay your bills and eat - that's all you need. when i moved across country 8 years ago i moved in temporarily with my mother. and even though my mother didn't interfere in my life it still drove me nuts not being there and free to live my life as i chose. you will also feel better about yourself taking care of yourself and your child.

    Answer by figaro8895 at 7:25 PM on May. 21, 2010

  • it's "providing for my son and me" not "my son and I"

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:19 PM on May. 21, 2010

  • I am sorry you are going through this. but YOU are the babys mother, HE is the babys father. She can't tell you NOR him that he can't be with his child. Either she accepts it, or you live on your own. I am sorry it came to this, *hugs*

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:20 PM on May. 21, 2010

  • get out of there while you can. go to your local community action center, or the like, and they can provide with all kinds of local agencies to help you with this, and make it easier for you to get by on your own. your mother should be ashamed of the way she is acting, is sad that she refusues to realize this will only make things worse between the both of you. hopefully she wili figure it out before its too late. and if there is only one person allowed in the delivery room during the actual birth, i would probably choose my baby's father. (some hospitals are like that, mine was). im so sorry you have to deal with this, you shouldnt have to ever, and certainly not when pregnant. i would definetly move out of there ASAP.

    Answer by jeanniegirl82 at 7:22 PM on May. 21, 2010

  • I think your idea is a good one. Being independent is the way to go in my opinion. Sign up now in case there is a long waiting list.

    Answer by admckenzie at 7:23 PM on May. 21, 2010

  • There are ways around MOM. If you want to see the father. Just go somewhere else to see him other then her house. It is probably best to move out as soon as posible.

    Answer by louise2 at 7:25 PM on May. 21, 2010

  • hugsYa unless he is abusive she has no right to say he can't see his child.... go to your local DSHS and they can point you in the right direction.... GL!


    Answer by June_Mama09 at 7:26 PM on May. 21, 2010

  • Absolutely that's what you do. Not one question on that.

    Answer by gdiamante at 7:37 PM on May. 21, 2010

  • Why aren't the two of you considering moving in together or getting married after the baby is born?

    Answer by LoriKeet at 7:49 PM on May. 21, 2010

  • if you leave there will be struggle but you will be fine but at least with your mom you'll have all you need. I wouldn't leave just bc she has rules yes you are 22 but you sound immature.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:51 PM on May. 21, 2010