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Why is sex such a big deal?

Yes ok it feels good at the time sure.

But other than that momentary feeling; why is it such a big deal?

Why isn't emotional intimacy more important?

Is there another mammal on the planet that has sex just for 'fun' and not because of the instinct to reproduce?

I fear I will end up alone because I just could really care less about it.


Asked by Anonymous at 8:16 PM on May. 22, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • Dolphins and chimpanzees also mate for pleasure and not for procreation. So yes, there are other mammals that have sex for fun.

    Sex is such a big deal because it's not just something that feels good at the time. It's a deeply ingrained instictual drive. It is NEEDED in the same way food is needed. Our brains react the same way when offered food or sex, the same parts are stimulated. It's a part of the brain that doesn't take orders from the neocortex (the thinking brain), all it knows is that sex is good for the species and so you are supposed to do it often.

    For many people emotional intimacy IS just as important, or even more important, but you will probably have a hard time finding someone who just doesn't want sex. You don't have to base a relationship on sex, but it is something that most relationships need in order to stay afloat.


    Answer by Ati_13 at 8:22 PM on May. 22, 2010

  • How old are you. you will not be alone one day you will find someone that is on the same page as you good luck

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:19 PM on May. 22, 2010

  • My advice is to find out why you have no sex drive. Is it age? Weight? Diet? Health concerns? Is it that you are unstable in your life so your brain and body don't want to procreate? Is it a hormonal imbalance? There's nothing wrong with having a low sex drive or with placing importance in your relationships on emotional closeness and mutual respect, but if you have NO sex drive it is a signal that something is off.

    I hope this helped.

    Answer by Ati_13 at 8:24 PM on May. 22, 2010

  • maybe you are just not in touch with your sexual side. i was like that until one of the men i dated for like a year really showed me the ropes. oh man! i love sex now. you really just have to find out what you like to enjoy it, maybe you just havent found it yet.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:24 PM on May. 22, 2010

  • There are many men out there who can't have sex anymore who are looking for intimacy. They just don't advertise bc they are afraid of being rejected. You won't be alone. I spent 15 yrs alone and then found SO. He's having trouble with impotency but I swear I feel closer to him when he can't get his mini him hard. We have playtime and intimacy without sex on those days and it's amazing. Hang in there and just let folks you know be aware of what you are looking for then let life guide the right man to you

    Answer by admckenzie at 10:05 PM on May. 22, 2010

  • You don't have to think it is a big deal if you don't want to. But to a lot of men it is a big deal. To some women it is a big deal too, like me. It is a connection and a mutual satisfaction that nothing else quite compares to. A basic human drive.

    Answer by bjane01 at 11:15 PM on May. 22, 2010

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