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Neighbor issues...What to do?

We have a little boy that lives next door. He is 6. He is not the nicest boy and doesn;t listen. He comes over to play often and I usually end up sending him home for being mean to my son or not listening to me. (my boys are only 2 & 3) Anyway, the neighbor across the street came over and asked if Timmy was playing outside with us early today. I said, no, was he in our yard? I have told him before to not come in our yard when we are not out and not home. She said he come from the back so she thought maybe we were out back, stopped by a bush on the side of the house and peed on it! Should I go to talk to his parents, even though I am not the one who saw him do it? I was thinking of maybe just mentioning it to him next time he comes over and tell him if I see him out the window or a neighbor sees him when we are not home I will be telling his parents.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:35 PM on May. 23, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (8)
  • I would just mention it to him next time, might be enough to embarrass him that he never does it again.
    MamaRoberts

    Answer by MamaRoberts at 10:39 PM on May. 23, 2010

  • I would just talk to the parents-
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:40 PM on May. 23, 2010

  • First off, after the second time I had to ask him to leave, there is no way I would give him the chance for a third! So in my opinion you are already being way to lenient!

    However, seeing as how YOU did not witness him peeing on your bush, I wouldn't make a stink over it. It would be your word (or your neighbors word) against his when it came to his parents and having two adults against a 6yr seems kinda cruel. I would however be speaking to his parents about his ongoing behavior! Make it clear that when he is at YOUR house, he will not only obey YOUR rules but also respect your kids... And if he can't do that he isn't welcome.

    Your kids don't need that kind of influence nor do they need to thing that's what friends are.
    SabrinaMBowen

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 10:43 PM on May. 23, 2010

  • OP here-
    That is kind of what I was thinking, he might be embarrassed that he was caught. I am hesitant to tell the parents because I don't really think much would be done and I don't want to make things odd between us. They don't really discipline, they just yell about everything, especially dad. I think that is why he likes to come over here, we actually talk to him.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:45 PM on May. 23, 2010

  • Well and to add to it, he might not completely understand and this is where that though comes from. My son's are allowed to pee outside as long as we are out at my mom's house or my MIL's house. They live in the country and seriously who cares, but I did have to teach them that they CAN NOT do this when we are home since we live in the city....when it comes down to it, it's not the worst thing he could do.

    I would make it clear to him that he can not do that EVER again, and if he decides to not follow your rules or listen to you at all, keep sending him home. He will eventually catch on that he can not act like that at your house and he will comply. I wouldn't even give him leeway, one strike and your out method. Parents can be tricky and if he is just coming over to your house whenever, I would let him especially since it seems to be an escape if he is getting yelled at all the time.
    MamaRoberts

    Answer by MamaRoberts at 11:33 PM on May. 23, 2010

  • boys are going to pee where ever they please and if he is not nice then neither are his parents...apple does not fall far from the tree.
    You need to just tell the boy he cannot come over and play, just tell him he is 6 and is too old for your kids that he needs to play with kids his own age...that way your not being mean just putting things into perspective.
    Why does he need to play with younger kids? Let the situation with him peeing on the bush go...really it is not a big deal. it is not like he threw eggs at your house.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:35 PM on May. 23, 2010

  • Anon, I have 4 boys and I can assure you that they knew beetter than to pee outdoors. They were potty trained young and knew what a toilet was used for. That said, this child is 6, talking to HIM isn't going to soolve this issue because he's just a little boy. Talk to his parents.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:58 PM on May. 23, 2010

  • Wandering the neighborhood is my concern. Peeing outside...hello, boys do this kind of thing...let it go.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:36 AM on May. 24, 2010

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