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I Have a question....

My son is 2-1/2. he is an only child and gets tons of attention. he is in part time daycare and the other part he's with grandma, on the weekends he gets me mostly but a lot from dad all attention wise.. Here's the question.. He complains CONSTANTLY that his tummy hurts or that he's sick.. always wants a wash cloth on his tummy, however its mostly at bedtime and when he wakes up- I get the bedtime that maybe he doesn't want to go to bed so its attention but why the AM? I am trying to get ready for work and get him ready and he's whinging and crying he's sick, hold me, and he will just lay on me. He wakes at night and says and does the same thing. Finally after months of taking to nurses and trying all I knew, I had my husband take him in to the Dr. The dr ( and my husband has been saying this all along ) that he's trying to get attention and he's fine. waking at night is now habit- that's it.. why would he seek attention ??

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:18 PM on May. 24, 2010 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (13)
  • OP: why would he seek such negative attention? at night he wakes 2-3 times. sometimes he goes right back to bed by me saying its still beditme but if I let him CIO, he freaks out .. like one time when I first tried to just let him cry per my husbands' request, he literally freaked out and flipped around screaming ( not night terrors - mad I didn't go in there ) and hit his bedrail and had a bruise on his nose and face.. that's why I said I can't let him cry - well now my know it all husband said its my fault for making it a habit and babying him and I am the one making him say he's sick all the time to be picked up... what do I do then if he says he's sick or wants a washcloth? I don't say OH MY BABY or coddle the hell out of him.. I try to not even say anythign and jsut give him what he wants to lesson the attention towards it..
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:23 PM on May. 24, 2010

  • Are his bowel movements normal? Did dr test him for lactose intollerance? He could be allergic to certain foods that are causing stomach aches. Dont stop at one dr's opinion. My son had a horrible stomach problem with encoprisis, might have spelled that wrong, sorry its been years. I had to go through three pediatricians to get to a specialist at a childrens hospital. It might be attention, but it really sounds like its something more serious to me
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:22 PM on May. 24, 2010

  • How much time do you actually spend with him? I don't mean while you are doing dishes, cleaning up, or other activities. How much time do you spend doing nothing but playing with him? If you feel that you spend enough time, then he's just playing you.
    Jademom07

    Answer by Jademom07 at 2:23 PM on May. 24, 2010

  • OP: I totally spend ALL my time with him... Like he does laundry with me, helps me cook or wash dishes etc. if he wants to, otherwise I will wait for him to go to bed - I work outside the home so my weekends are all I have with him and don't want to miss out.. that's what I mean, why is he playing me?? for what purpose?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:24 PM on May. 24, 2010

  • :OP - we go on walks together, play at the park - dig in sand together, I am not a sit and watch my child play, I am fully in the dirt or water or play with his cars or make the fort with him type mom...
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:25 PM on May. 24, 2010

  • Maybe when he acts this way at day care or at grandmas he gets a lot of attention. Have you talked to the other people who take care of him?


    You just need to tell him to stop. Or take his temp. And then tell him you are not sick, you do not have a temp. For the stomach act thing. Give him some water and tell him that will make your stomach stop hurting. Kids are gullible

    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 2:26 PM on May. 24, 2010

  • I would get a second oppinion. Mabie that dr is missing something... Never hurts to get a second opinion especialy when yr talking about yr childs health, mabie its a habbit or mabie he really isnt feeling good... Use yr instinkt if you think its an attention thing mabie it is, but if you think yr baby is really hurting ask another dr!
    candlefire22

    Answer by candlefire22 at 2:27 PM on May. 24, 2010

  • He is seeking attention because he wants to stay at home with you instead of go to daycare. Something unpleasant may even be going on at his daycare. Either something is happening at daycare or he just misses you and needs more quality time from you. The books "7 Love Languages" for kids may help you.
    ThrivingMom

    Answer by ThrivingMom at 2:28 PM on May. 24, 2010

  • OP: he is home with Dad today and does this even on nights and days' he doesn't have to go to daycare, otherwise I might think the same thing.. however he has soccer at daycare and friends and tells me what they did and I get a daily sheet stating how his mood was and what they did etc.. I know that is not always 100% accurate though.. He IS lactose intolerant and has food allergies, we have narrowed it down the very best we can but there again, after 3 ped's I can't find one that will do allergy testing for him being it is far too inaccurate at this age unless its life threatening.. so I feed him organic onyl and no processed foods and no dairy/milk unless its soy which he seems to tolerate, he's had constipation issues I saw a dietician and we have deteremined he must have daily amounts of at least 7 gram s of fiber a day or it affects him badly for days. school and grandma tell me they follow this..
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:33 PM on May. 24, 2010

  • I was gonna ask, "How does GRANDMA react to this?" It could be she gives him junk food when he does this or lets him get out of naps, or something along those lines.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:34 PM on May. 24, 2010

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